Some days you wake up and you just know that the day is going to suck.
That's how I woke up today.
I didn't want to get out of bed because I knew that when the day started for me at school everything was going to S.U.C.K.
I don't normally wake up this way. Neh.. If only I could be sick. Except I have to get all my work for my clsses for tomorrow cause I'm leaving at like 10:30 cause I have to see DFS (department of family services) again and see a phycologets(sp).
The whole thing with the counceling started up again. I'm tired of people thinking I'm koo koo bananas.
I'm really not.
I'm not even sad that often anymore.
Okay I lied.
The past few weeks there has been like maybe 2 days where I'm not sad.
But I have a reason to be sad honestly.
My mom made me break up with Justin. (after we got back together) and I thought I was gonna be finally happy. But then I had to break up with him because my mom wasn't comfratable with me dating him... And now he's ******** up his life compleatly...
I mean when we were dating I knew he did things he wasn't suppose to do.. Like he went out and got high a few times. But he was never high around me..
But now that him and I arn't together he's like super open about it and does even more s**t he shouldn't be doing..
The other day he was gonna run away (and he could too. He may not have his licence anymore but he has friends) and I got super depressed an almost cut myself.. But I realized if I did someone would findout and I wouldn't get anymore privacy and more stuff would come up with DFS and it would screw up my relationsship with my family in some ways... So I didn't cut... But still. The feeling was there and I almost gave in............ I love Justin a lot.. And I didn't want to breakup with him...... I guess I'll get over it... I told him I'm done dating.. I'm tired ofbeing hurt or hurting people or being with people my parents don't approve of...... Well what ever.. I'm off to go do something.. Not sure what though
 Imora Thea Mi Savur · Tue Sep 18, 2007 @ 11:29am · 1 Comments |
