> > **TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE > > > > * > > > > *1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. > > He thought he was > > God and I didn't. > > 2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute > > of it. > > 3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to > > kill them. > > > > 4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. > > 5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out > > alive. > > > > 6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to > > me > > 7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. > > 8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. > > > > 9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just > > missing. > > 10... Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. > > > > 11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, > > why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine. > > 12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many. > > 13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. > > > > 14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. > > 15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? > > > > 16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than > > being under it! > > 17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When > > I Grew up. > > 18 . Procrastinate Now! > > > > 19.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries > > With That? > > 20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes. > > 21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash > > advance. > > > > 22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere! > > 23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already > > taken. > > 24..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD. > > > > 25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up > > three thousand > > times the memory. > > 26.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a > > lifetime commitment for a > > pig. > > 27.. The trouble with life is there's no background > > music. > > > > 28.. The original point and click interface was a Smith > > & Wesson. > > 29.. I smile because I don't know what the hell is > > going on. > > > > Appreciate every single thing you have ... especially your > > friends! > > Life is too short and friends are too few!
angelskky · Wed Oct 08, 2008 @ 06:59am · 0 Comments |