|
This Entry Is On Its Way... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Well, here it is. I haven't got much to say, only because I'm at a loss for words as to what I could mention or not mention. Several of my friends are going through tough times, and I can't stand it because it seems these sort of things always happen when I come out of something bad myself. I don't have any way to share my happiness with anyone else, because I'm afraid they'll be pissed off at me or something weird like that.
People have broken up, people are losing their grip, people are being expelled, people are worrying and stressing, and I just want to hide. It's cowardly, but I'd much rather lock myself in my room and avoid everyone to pretend that everything's right with the world. I think that's why I'm so interested in Animal Crossing, it's a fantasy world where everyone's glad to see me, and I can do whatever I want, and always help people out, and just kick back. People have been getting on my nerves, especially on Gaia, and it's made me want to go on hiatus in terms of being here regularly, other than to check for PM's or write up Journal entries. But I can send mail to my neighbors on AC, and write in that journal. I don't think I could abandon everyone though, it wouldn't be right. I just have no idea how to solve anyone's problems, when I'd much rather just deal with what I have for myself.
I've been doing a lot of reading again as well. I think tomorrow I might take a visit to the library and clear my head, and then stop at Hallmark to pick up a card for my Grandma. It was her birthday, and I totally spaced. It makes me feel like s**t that she never forgets, and since Kelly's been here, we've all but abandoned any contact with our real grandma. I feel bad saying "real", but that's how it is. I know, somewhere, Kelly's family doesn't care for me so much. I think it's the rascism or something, cause they love John. But then I can wonder about my dad, but I guess since he's her husband, they're obliged. I guess maybe it was because he was so warm to them and he's like a model person, and I'm no very friendly to people I don't know very well. I can just sort of sense some kind of resentment, and I felt it in Illinois too. It was the stares, for the most part.
I've been trying to work up a Secret Santa for everyone, but that's even been a downer, since everyone's in such a bad mood, no one wants to talk, and I get stuck in the center waving my arms trying to get people to come together. I kind of want to abandon the idea, since no one seems up for it, but I really don't wanna give up on it, a lot of us are leaving, and I want this year to be special. But I hope my efforts aren't in vain. As for the entry for like a week ago, I think I'll update it.
Sunday was like the best day this week, since me and Russ went to see an advanced screening of Harry Potter, from special passes my dad gave me a week ago. We went to some Anime Picnic all the AV Sub-Groups were holding, but that wasn't as great. We stuck near Jason though, and had Taco Bell.
So, all in all, I have some work to do, including school. Speaking of which, I got my report card: 3 A's, 1 B, and 1 C. That C really pisses me off, but I know I did better than some people, so I guess I can't complain.
Edible Substance · Fri Nov 18, 2005 @ 05:42am · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|