Ever feel like you are going to explode? I do.
I feel like I am going to break. That is the problem though. I promised I wouldn't. I break and all hell will break out for me. I won't hesitate from hurting her, from thoughing all the pain that she has caused me back into her face.
The problem with that is I wouldn't be able to stop. I would tell her about the tears she has made Sara cry when she had done nothing wrong. How David is only trying to be like every normal teen, free. Independence is a trait that I respect. She kills it.
We do what she tells us we must. We do what she thinks is right. We keep silent when we rage. We don't want to be forced to do more. One of us rages and the rest just sigh in relief that is isn't them this time that broke from restraint.
I just want to raise my voice and scream at her. Why the hell are you doing this? Are you that ******** stupid? Do you not know that you are driving us farther and farther away? Does she not know that it makes even that happiest of us think about things that we shouldn't? Does she not know that we look running away or filing for imancupation. Hell, in the darkest times, even suicide sounds better.
My live's sorrow used to revolve around friends distrusting me and people dying.
Now it is centered on the one person in the world who somehow gained the power to harness us in. Coddling us like babies will not make it true.
I want to hurt something...sometimes it doesn't matter if it is myself. I want to rage, to give up the resemblence of respect that my mother taught me. I want to disgrace all my hard work by breaking her jaw.
Show her that she isn't the only one in the world. Those with power should use it for good.
What happened today is pathetic. Our room has been moved into the living room. Joy. We settled into bed (chair and a couch) and what happens. She wants to watcha movie. Direct quote: 'This is pathetic. Move all this. Mike and I will want to watch a movie soon'.
I have never met someon that selfish.
And it is shattering me inside. What trust do I have in people when someone I detest is living right here with me. What trust should I keep when she keeps showing me people can never deserve it.
I have never gotten in a fight with someone. I have gotten along with most people on this earth. Some people say I am a wonderful person who is an excellent judge off character.
What does that tell you about the one person I wouldn't mind killing, even if I will have hell to pay?"
Forum Freedom Fighter Community Member 
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