Ever have one of those days when literally everything goes wrong and you want to give up on life...love...everything? Well today was one of those days. I lost my best friend and everything else all in the span of an hour. Well ******** it. I can't take anything anymore. The pain digs deep under my skin until I just can't stand it. If there was some way to reverse what I said and did...if only there was some way to stop today from happening.
I hurt someone who meant the world to me...and there's nothing I can do about it. Marcus...I'm sorry. That's partially why I did what I did...to stop anything...everything...before things went further. But it still hurts. I can't help thinking I made the wrong decision...and now you're gone for good. I hate myself for all of this, and I'll miss you like nothing else. I'm sorry and goodbye.
As for everyone else, don't be suprised if I'm moody when I get back to school on monday. It's just too much to handle. A sickness that wont let up, a heartache that should never have existed, and all the weighty guilt that hangs on my shoulders.
I could've had it all...what was I thinking? I don't know...just trying to figure things out I guess. Well it doesn't really matter anymore, does it....
 SonicBeauty · Sat Feb 05, 2005 @ 08:20pm · 8 Comments |
