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um. I don't know i feel bad today..different reasons but i cant tell if it's just a teen mood swing thing, or if i'm coming to a realization w/ my heart ((i hope it's not that)) or if i'm just making this worse than it seems. anyways i know everyone is tired of me sad or mad or somthing, So yeah I'm sorry annd..i dunno i just really hope that..it's only cuz i dont see this someone in real life, I'm not w/ her in real life i hope that's all it is, cuz it's hurting myself thinking that all i'm doing is lying to her, and i don't think i am really, but it hurts and it sucks to come to realization, its either that, change of heart which God i hope isnt happening, a really bad day, or just that i am not w/ her in real life. I dont know but i'm tired of always feeling guilty and bad and like a low life liar and ugh.