My family came over today. Can't really say much, I never really feel like a part of the family. I don't know why. *shrugs* We all went down to the lake and it started to rain. Everyone else left but I just stayed on the dock, letting the water soak through my clothes, letting the cool air numb my mind and emotions. I was wondering why all of a sudden the water became warm and that's when I realized I was crying. Crying? I thought. Michela, you wimp, suck it up. Why are you crying? And, well I don't have an answer.
Maybe it was cuz I was thinking about what someone told me, that I rely on other people too much. Or maybe it was the time someone told me I was just like my dad. I still don't know why. Maybe I'm just stupid.
I have to go to court with my mom to get child support from my dad. I'm scared. If he tells the judge he wants to see me every other weekend and the judge rules in his favor... I'm gunna kill myself. I'm not even kidding. I do not wanna see him every other weekend. The only reason he would do that would be so he wouldn't have to pay a lot of child support. He doesn't even want me; so me being forced to go with him would be miserable. sad
Maybe it was cuz I was thinking about what someone told me, that I rely on other people too much. Or maybe it was the time someone told me I was just like my dad. I still don't know why. Maybe I'm just stupid.
I have to go to court with my mom to get child support from my dad. I'm scared. If he tells the judge he wants to see me every other weekend and the judge rules in his favor... I'm gunna kill myself. I'm not even kidding. I do not wanna see him every other weekend. The only reason he would do that would be so he wouldn't have to pay a lot of child support. He doesn't even want me; so me being forced to go with him would be miserable. sad
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