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THE MILLION DOLLAR RECIPE

There's a moment in the movie "Holiday Inn" where Bing Crosby, who owns a small club in Connecticut, barks at two Hollywood moguls who want to use his idea as the basis for an extravagant motion picture.

Crosby laments that he was naive to think the club would remain a simple, low-key place where performers could come and do what they love, without the flash and glitz.

If Crosby were still alive, he might ask the same question about the 2005 edition of the Pillsbury Bake-Off.

Conceived in 1949 as a chance for amateur cooks to create new recipes using Pillsbury ingredients, the Bake-Off was a winner from the start.

These days, however, the simple execution of a good recipe may not satisfy the hyperinflated needs of the television camera. In the age of the maniacal Iron Chef and the hyperbolic Martha Stewart, TV cooking must become an event and a drama.

And thus does the Pillsbury Bake-Off, which rewards basic lip-smacking recipes like Peanut Blossoms, Zesty Italian Crescent Casserole and Tunnel of Fudge Cake, become "Million Dollar Recipe."

In fact, the Bake-Off itself is unchanged. All that's different is the $1 million first prize, up from $50,000 in 1949, and the unspoken hope that some contestants may want it badly enough to generate exciting television in its pursuit.

This year, at least, that's not happening.

The producers may secretly want a "reality show," and one can only imagine what the contestants would have to do if Fox were running things.

But this isn't Fox. It's Bravo, which means we get a documentary in which 100 finalists fix their recipes in an atmosphere of cordiality and good manners. Judges pick four category winners and a grand prize winner, who gets the $1 million.

The cameras follow seven contestants and they occasionally say things that hint at dramatic tension, like:


"This isn't just fun and games."

"This is where people take themselves to the limit."

"Failure is not an option."

"The enormity of it hit me last night."
But in the end, it's a show about cooks preparing recipes, and even $1 million can't turn it into "Survivor."

Besides, the contestants are simply too nice. Even the formerly high-powered bank executive here becomes the kind of middle-American who, if you got a cold, would bake you a pie and bring it to your house.

They wouldn't last 10 seconds on "The Apprentice