Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

As I sit here and stare off into the nothingness beyond the white paint of these four walls, I realize that I've found a sudden peace within myself beyond the chaos I breathe throughout my daily life. I feel calm and collected, almost Perfect. The hum of silence lingers in my ear drum, as I dream with my eyes open and ignore my surroundings. It is not a cage, if I can see beyond it.

I want something new. If only there was an adventure beyond my comprehension waiting for me... I've lived in my fantasy world for too long...It's taken me. And I don't want to come back. I don't ever want to return to the hurt of being who I am as I am where I am.

I don't think i can cope with this outside world beyond these walls anymore. And yet, I desire to run as far as I can as fast as I can... Where am I going? I can ask myself over and over, but she'll never tell me. An adventure is what I seek. A paradise. Something new.

We will all come to our end, once it's time to be the adult and play the game of taxes and workdays. Over and over and over and over...

I will go from place to place and have my adventure, either before it ends for me, or when it never ends. I refuse to let it be the end. The adventure cannot end if there is an infanit objective and no set destination. They will see through my eyes, They will know their wrongs, and they will eat their words.


I am not a nothing. I just bask in the false reality of the nothingness in hopes of finding myself a reason to be a something, and thus becoming that something but not for a somebody. Just myself, as I am. Change will not occur for the worse unless I decide to face the curruption with intention of following it. But the seed was not planted here. I just covered a blank ground with soil to hide it from them, while among them. They grow grow grow, but I remain.

the nothings change, and the pressure is on, but I will not be one of them. I will sit here and stare off into my paradise and find my way out. I am not caged. I just remain. I will stand, when I find my reason.

I almost have it. Close. Close.

One day I will know for sure.