Yay Chuck Norris Jokes FACT'S:
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The H3ll was That?"
There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.
When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chucksized.
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris did in fact, build Rome in a day.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Chuck Norris doesn't chew gum. Chuck Norris chews tin foil.
When the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
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