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THE ETERNAL CIRCLE OF PAIN & CONFUSION
I sit here and wonder what went wrong
Why all of a sudden my parents went so bipolar on me?
Why they used to support me and Kage's relationship
And now all of a sudden they made me decide between them or him.
I don't regret the choice I made,
But part of me wonders why they can't make their minds up
Why do they keep putting me on emotional rollercoasters?
Do they like seeing me on the verge of insanity?
Why are my own parents doing this to me?
Nothing makes sense anymore,
Talking to them feels so wrong and awkward.
Why'd they disown me before I left
Yet now they want to talk with me every single day?
They act like nothing's happened,
Almost as if they were in a fantasy or something.
Then when I try to remind them of everything they've said and done,
They blame me for all the bad things that've happened so far.
What'd I do to deserve this?
Why do they let my brother get away with drinking underage and drugs
But forbid me to love?
What sense is there in that? What type of justice are they enforcing?
Why do they continue to torment me?
Every time I talk with them, it feels like a bullet's stuck inside my heart,
Not piercing it but staying deep inside, almost as if it were sleeping in it
Making it so I can't die from it but I can suffer and still feel it.
I feel like I'm stuck in an eternal circle of pain, suffering, confusion
And as hard as I try to get out, I only get pulled in deeper,
Causing myself to suffer more and feel as if I'm suffocating.
Why won't they leave me alone? Why can't they let me live my life now that I'm gone?
Why won't they let me love my fiancee?
They've been married for almost 25 years
So why don't they understand the concept of true love?
Why won't they just leave me alone and help end my suffering?
I want to live my life to the fullest but they won't let me
I want to be free to make my own choices but they won't let me
I want to love freely but they won't let me
Yet they've said their purpose in life isn't to control me
But actions speak louder than words and they're saying they have lied to me basically.
Until I can end this confusion somehow,
I'll still feel like I'm in an eternal circle of confusion and pain
 Nina Layne Williams · Tue Aug 23, 2005 @ 09:20pm · 0 Comments |
