I figured out today that i have only...5 real friends. the rest are just using me like everyone else has. well that's their problem not mine. the only people i care about are the people that care about me. i dont need the rest of them. i'm not saying that i'm not hurt i'm just saying i think we would be better off going our seperate ways. so that's what we're doing. i'm not letting them use me anymore and they dont see the point in using me anymore. it's time to move on as i say.
besides that, i figured out that i'm truly and utterly in love, but being so far from him is not the best thing right now...i would do anything to be in his arms. to steal a kiss and a hug from him...it's kinda hard to do that when you're 466 miles apart. i'm thinking about running away to go see him. i cant stand waiting much longer...damn i hate this...i cant wait until i'm 16. then i might be able to see him. if no then i'll have to wait until i'm 18, which will really suck TT~TT
still thinking about suicide and i tried cutting myself. it didn't go too deep but it did make a cut. i'll have to try again sometime. anyways, no one knows about that so it'll remain a secret for awhile. my mom and me are getting along less and less. though she did buy me stuff at HT so cant say i hate her...but soon we wont get along at all. then who's going to buy me things at HT? loljk i just wish we didn't fight all the time. same with my dad. he isn't any better. well i better get going before my mom gets even more pissed at me for wasteing my life away on the computer as she says. so i'm out~
 miroku fan 101 · Wed Jul 23, 2008 @ 04:36am · 0 Comments |
