In the end, I suppose I only have 1 true goal in life. As long as I can accomplish this, then I can lose everything else. I wouldn't mind ending up alone for all eternity. I wouldn't care if the entire world was trying to kill me. I just have to do this. If I can't, I'd probably die. It's my worst nightmare to fail at this. By now, you probably just want me to shut up and tell you. I understand.
As long as I can protect the people I love and even the people I hate, then I'll be ok. I want to protect everyone. I know it's not likely that I can ever do this. I mean, come on! I'm only 15, but no. I will and I have to. I am a defender. When I fail someone and they get hurt, I just want to die. It hurts so much. No more. I will save them all and I will die in their place. That's my truest wish. To die alone but with everyone protected. Maybe someday, I'll truly be allowed that honor.
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Me, Myself, and I
Wow. Well, here it is my journal. The date is 7/15/07. I started Gaia yesterday (7/14/07). I'm really confused and all but most of my thoughts will be written (or typed) into this journal. I probably won't update alot so don't expect anything.
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