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i write things
2BEMO (feel free to copy it and show ur friends)

Entry 1 Wednesday
Dear Diary, today I’ve decided to actually write in a diary and document my dumb life. Hello, I’m Dameon, I hate life. I got beat up at school yesterday. Like usual. There’s no one there that actually understands me. I live with my mother, her two daughters and her new husband. My stepsisters,(twins) enjoy making fun of me and putting country cd’s in my stereo when I thought I was going to be listening my alternative music. Brats. My mother hasn’t had a decent boyfriend (all of which have become husbands) in about 15 years. She treats me like a slave. b***h. And finally, my disgusting step-dad at the moment. This fat man seems to only suck up all the money he can get out of my mother as his fat lips can get. Rat. Doesn’t my family sound nice?

Entry 2 Thursday
Dear Diary, I’ve been put in a group with the most obnoxious jock (Jacob Seabridge) in the sophomore classes in science class. He had been throwing pencils at me all class, until I threw one back at him and lodged it in his eye. The teacher believed it was an accident. My family is moving the day after tomorrow. To a place in Reno. (Our current town is right next to Reno) Today’s depressing act: narrowly escaped having my hand completely severed by the garbage disposal in the sink.(I’m missing a fingernail)

Entry 3 Friday
Dear Diary, Today at lunch, all of Jacobs’ friends came and beat the s**t out of me. They called me names. I got mad, and as they were walking away, nailed one of them in the head with my foot. (I quickly ran away after that) When I was running to Physics class, I accidently plowed some girl over. She has more piercing than I do. (That’s saying something) She’s really pretty. She told me her name was Cait. I shouldn’t get my hopes up though. She probably has a boyfriend. Today’s depressing act: Gym teacher had to pull me away from the broken electric wires hanging off the main building. (The teacher has a few bruises)

Entry 4 Saturday
Dear Diary, We moved our possessions out of the house and in into the new one. I don’t have much to move. My room is going to be even smaller than the one I have now. (On the tour, the guide called the room that would soon be mine, a storage closet that was used for hanging dead animal carcasses by the last owners.) ... I don’t eat meat. It’s a nice place though. Now I reside in the same city I go to school in. Today’s depressing act (I’ll call it TDA from now on): Cut my palm open and painted a circle of blood around my carcass holding storage bed-room.

Entry 5 Sunday
Dear Diary, I’m writing this around noon because my “family” is at church. I despise their religion. I’m a Satanist. They’re Christian. I can’t stop thinking about Cait. I don’t know why though. All I did was knock her over and say sorry. I can’t get my hopes up over this. TDA (so far): Set Mother’s bible on fire and put mine on the dias. I can’t wait to hear her read that during “Bible Study Time”.

Entry 6 Monday
Dear Diary, I didn’t see Cait today. My mother found the burnt and unreadable bible on the floor and started sobbing her head off screaming about how Satan did it, while I laughed my head off over it. She heard me and pushed me off the staircase. (There’s this big balcony thing that hangs over the dining room) <She pushed me off it. I spent the night in the emergency room (with a cracked ankle bone while my mother got wasted at a nearby Booze Joint. TDA: while the nurse wasn’t looking, I swallowed 4 extra painkillers and a few other pills.

Entry 7 Tuesday
Dear Diary, my project in science was finished and started by me, (Jacob hasn’t even look at me since I poked his eye out) but we got a decent grade on it anyway. I don’t have a cast on my ankle, but a brace, and I fortunately don’t have to use crutches. Cait came up to me during lunch and asked it I was okay. She also wondered how exactly I broke my ankle. I told her the real story. (She found it funny that I lit the bible on fire.) TDA: Locked one of the twins in the garage while I filled it up with water. (It’s waterproof, no water in, no water out)

Entry 8 Wednesday
Dear Diary, I’m bored with life. I should get out more. That’s why I slipped in with one of those Gothic Packs. Surprisingly, I saw Cait. So, I pushed my way though the crowd of lolita-style Marilyn Manson wanna-be’s and accidently bumped into some skinny girl who fell onto Cait. She looked up at me, giggled, and tugged me out of the horde. She asked me if I was in that group often, and I actually played that “Prince From A Disney Movie” role and said that I was there looking for her. We talked about random things until the buses came. Maybe there is a ray of sun in my dark cove-of-a-life. TDA: made a myspace, took pictures of myself pulling off fake death stunts (like hanging) as a tribute to the movie Ginger Snaps. Then I took a video of me cutting myself and put it on youtube.

Entry 9 Thursday
Dear Diary, today was gym day again. I took one of those severed cables that I mentioned before and shocked Jamee Malfoe with it. She screamed her head off far at least a half an hour in the infirmary. It is late Autumn, and my “family” is going to Maui without me. I get to stay home and watch the house. GREAT... The teacher everyone calls Mr. Von Soap (Really Von Soe) noticed my scars today. He seemed surprised, at least I only have him in career prep for this trimester. Cait and I sat next to each other at lunch. I’m starting to think she isn’t dating anyone. I should make a move soon. (I’ll check the internet for ideas) TDA: I robbed the blood bank (the Red Cross van) and brought home a quart sized plastic bag filled with blood. I poured it into a popsicle mold and waited a few hours for it to freeze, then gave it to my stepsisters.

Entry 10 Friday
Dear Diary, I invited Cait over to my house for tomorrow, my “family” just left for Maui. Cait can come. I think I’m actually excited for the first time in months. (The last time was when I first cut myself-I was proud) We are going to make more of those death photos (she saw the myspace). TDA: found a dead dog someone had hit on the side of the road, put it in my “parents’” bed for a little surprise when they got back. I also pierced my n****e myself.(Maybe I should have got a professional person to do it...)

Entry 11 Saturday
Dear Diary, Cait really came over today. I took pictures of her in creative ways of suicide. She looked so sexy with her back arched in one of them. I’ve figured out that she’s just like me, she said there’s no one that understands her.(besides me) Cait left around 3:00 pm. The rest of the day, I wandered around the house and gazed at the pictures I had taken . TDA: hot-glued metal horns to my step sister’s (Mary, not Juliana) cat. It didn’t like it very much... I also cut off the hamster’s head and flushed it down the toilet. (The head is jammed onto a pencil in her room.)

Entry 12 Sunday
Dear Diary, there was nothing to do today, so I walked to a nearby mall and bought things with money I got from working at Hot Topic there. I got some new cd’s and a cream that stops infections. (Yes, my n****e piercing got infected.) TDA: wrote I HATE YOU on my “parent’s” bedroom wall with my blood, and broke open one of my old cuts. (Up my left am)

Entry 13 Monday
Dear Diary, Ian Ericson and I were in the locker room changing back into clothes from a swimming class in gym, when he remarked on how small my d**k was. That obviously got me mad, so I took a razor that I keep with me and cut the word gay into his forehead. He looked really funny. Cait came over to my house after school, and I helped her put the pictures on her myspace. She did something weird. She had fallen on me because of the cluttered smallness of my room, then she just sat there,(on me) looking at my face. Why does that make me feel ugly? TDA: nothing much, cut my wrists, made the open cut (Up my left arm) even wider.

Entry 14 Tuesday
Dear Diary, Cait said she got in trouble at home from coming over to my house. (She also said she would do it again in an instant if she had the chance) In Physics, Jacob threw a balled up piece of paper with the words “you are going to die tomorrow night”on it. Sounds fun. I wish that all people were that thought ful . Cait has moved classes, so now she’s in my calculus college prep. class. I am listening to a song that makes me sad. TDA: went into the cemetery late at night and dug up a newly-buried body and put it in a chair at home. (I put eyeliner on him)

Entry 15 Wednesday
Dear Diary, I only have one week left without my “family” being here. That’s why Cait got permission from her parents to come over here every day this week to do homework and stuff.(that starts tomorrow) I’ve just turned to look at the moon out my tiny window- and saw Cait, I’m letting her in now.

Entry 16 Thursday
Dear Diary, Cait slept over here last night. Her parents had gotten drunk and hitting Cait and her younger brother Sam. Cait took Sam to a friends’ house (none of her brothers’ friends parents didn’t particularly want her to sleep there), then came here. She said that she might have to stay for a few days. Today and yesterday’s TDA: yesterday: before I found Cait at my window, popped weight loss pills and got so wired that I stared poking the dead guy in the chair, laughing my head off. Today: Cait helped me dress the body (that she thought was cool) in my step-father’s clothes.

Entry 17 Friday
Dear Diary, I only have the amount of time that Cait spends in the shower to write this (that could be any time). My “parents” didn’t pay the oil bill, so I have no heat, and it’s cold at night. I didn’t die like Jacob said I would last night. So, I told him that, and he punched me in the face. We started a fist fight in the middle of physics class. (Luckily there was a sub- teacher in the room at the time.) I hear her turning the shower off, she’ll be out soon. I stabbed Jacob in the arm with the pocket knife, and that finished the fight. TDA: bought one of those self-tattoo kits and gave myself one. (It’s of a Japanese symbol for blood)

Entry 18 Saturday
Dear Diary, Cait kissed me. When I was cutting in my room, she just came in and started kissing me. Kissing is more fun than I thought it would be. I’ve never kissed anyone before.(let alone been wanted to kiss someone) I felt like I was flying through ecstacy. (Or what I think ecstacy is) I could feel her passion, fear and sadness. I wanted to hold her, but there was a knock at the door. It was those people with the magazines for Christianity. Before I answered it, I grabbed a paint ball gun. When I opened the door with the gun, they ran back to their landrover. TDA: Couldn’t stop thinking of Cait to go to sleep, so I just downed the whole bottle of the sleep stuff, then snorted a few crushed up weight loss tablets to make me happy.

Entry 19 Sunday
Dear Diary, Cait’s still here, and I’ve been thinking about what Ian Ericson had said. (About my d**k) While Cait was still asleep (around 7:00am), I biked to the Jack’s Goods where you can buy anything. When I bought THAT... I came back here to see if it worked. (Luckily, Cait was in the shower thinking I was still asleep.)She happened to want to see if I was awake when I had my pants partway down in my room...she also saw the package on my bed. That could’ve ruined my relationship with her, but she just smiled and said, “You don’t need that, there are other ways to make it bigger!” and walked out. That made me want her even more somehow. TDA: tried the p***s pump on my neighbor’s male dog Otis... it worked... (the D in TDA stood for disturbing today)

Entry 20 Monday
Dear Diary, the day after tomorrow, my “family” are coming back. I took the dead dog out of my “parents” bed (it had rotted and bled enough). I showed Cait Otis from over the fence that separates the two yards. She came up with Otis The Horny Gay Dog (aka: OTHGD) Ian doesn’t talk to me now, and is having a hard time covering up GAY written on his forehead with his buzz-cut. It’s the end of the 2nd trimester tomorrow. Next trimester, I’m in most of the same classes that Cait is in. She sent me a note in math class saying: do you ?me? I walked up to her at the end of class, about to say I did ,(I was smiling for once at school) when she started kissing me again. Bliss. That’s what I’ll call it. TDA: shocked the recovering Jamee again in gym

Entry 21 Tuesday
Dear Diary, you know how people say that their lover makes their word ‘go round’. That’s how I feel. Cait wants to sleep in my bed with me.-no sex or anything. (The news said it would be a cold night too) She’s in the bathroom now. I wonder what she’d think if she knew I wrote in a diary. Oh. She’s coming. TDA: carved a heart into my hand with a pen.

Entry 22 Wednesday
Dear Diary, last night was perfect. No sex. Just felicity. (complete happiness) My “family” are due to get home around 11:00pm. Cait told me that her brother was still at the friend’s house because her parents got arrested for some reason she didn’t know. My mother wouldn’t be very happy to know I’ve been living with a female alone for over a week. (She won’t be very happy anyways) I still plan to keep Cait here as long as she needs to be. If she does, she won’t be able to sleep on the couch in the livingroom anymore, because my “family” will do things to her to make her want to leave. TDA: I tried again with the garbage disposal unit thing, and lost half of another fingernail.

Entry 23 Thursday
Dear Diary, Cait was in my bed with me when my “family” got back (they were stuck at an airport for a day). My mother expected me to be ready to carry in her heavy suitcases. She kicked my door open, but favorably, I was on the side of the bed closest to the wall and able to hide Cait from my mother. I mumbles like it was to myself that I would be right back. It wasn’t until around 1:30am that I heard the yells from my “parent’s” bedroom. I guess they found the guts in their bed. TDA: (D is for dirty) I managed to hide a girl (Cait) in bed with me. We swapped blood .(Cut our palms and pressed them together.)

Entry 24 Friday
Dear Diary, Cait and I slipped out before my “family” woke up. We walked to the school then hung out around there. She and I talked about things we wanted in life. One of hers was to pierce her umbilicus(navel). I told her I could do it for her if we went to the Jack’s Goods and bought a kit. She was enthralled. I noticed it in classes that she wasn’t in, that she was like a drug, and if you didn’t have the drug, you go senseless. I found something she had written on my floor this morning. It was a diary entry, it read:
Why am I making my life revolve around him? My old friends want to know that . I told them it was because I loved Dameon, but it’s really something more. I need him, my life was miserable before that day he bumped into me. He is what I’m living for. I love him more than anything else.
TDA: Wrote her diary entry across my chest in my blood, substituting my name with hers.

Entry 25 Saturday
Dear Diary, I did buy Cait a piercing kit and pierced her navel for her. (She made sexy groaning noises all the way through it) She was really contented with the results. We leave before my “family” wakes up, and come back before they get back from work/school, or after they’re asleep or out somewhere. I took Cait to a restaurant called Areales D’sion . Even though I don’t eat meat, there was still a lot to pick from. The atmosphere there was nice, and the place was filled with mostly couples. TDA: as I walked by a table, I sliced some mans’ hand open by accident.

Entry 26 Sunday
Dear Diary, I had memorized her diary entry, so I read it to her (with her name in place of mine). She was really surprised. Cait pierced my other n****e today, because she disapproves of me doing it myself again. Today, I actually was the one that started kissing her. TDA: I learned why french-kissing was always called gross by my childhood classmates.

Entry 27 Monday
Dear Diary, Von Soap told the school counselor about the cuts he had noticed awhile back. So, there I was sitting in that tiny office for half the day. I saw Cait through the window a few times. When we got back to the house, we learned that my step-sisters were already home. They were obnoxious toward Cait, so I locked them in their room, then flushed the key down the toilet. (Then heard a scream as Juliana found the hamster’s head.) Cait started crying and kept asking me whether I was going to be put into one of those alternative education places. I hugged her and told her I wouldn’t go to a place like that. TDA: after school, I put the dead body in the counselor’s office... I wonder if she’ll suspect it was me...

Entry 28 Tuesday
Dear Diary, the counselor didn’t suspect me, but past grave robbers that attend the school. My step sisters were let out of their room, and got my step father to take a few punches at me. I let him, then went back to bed. Cait fretted over me after that. She slept with no shirt on... um... w o w ..... she hasn’t done that before.(she also cuddled closer than usual.) TDA: put a video that I had taken of Cait piercing my n****e on youtube. I instantly got comments. One said: dood. I wish I wuz the girl. Um....eew...

Entry 30 Wednesday
Dear Diary, I killed the counselor. Oh s**t... What am I going to do? She wanted me to go to Alt. Ed.! I took all the records of her ever forcing me into her office and burned them. Cait disapproved it, but helped me get rid of her body. ********... I’ll be put in jail for this. Cait kissed me all night long, but I could tell she was afraid for me. TDA: when we were burying the counselor in some abandoned graveyard, I drew an extra eye on her forehead with a sharpie.

Entry 31 Thursday
Dear Diary, all the blame for the dead counselor was put on the grave robbers. That’s good. I thought I was going to be put in jail or something. All day, I was digging my knife into myself, worrying that the cops would come for me. Cait is all jumpy today too. I hate dealing with all this. TDA: Shaved the cat, covered it in fake blood and watched it freak out my “family”.

Entry 32 Friday
Dear Diary, I think everyone would be better off if I wasn’t here. Cait won’t have to cover up what I do, my “family” won’t have to deal with me, and the school will have room for another prep to join. Everyone wins. Tomorrow at the bridge. I’ll get a rope ready. TDA: as a goodbye message, I knocked Mary out and carved my will into her. I also lit the school on fire.

Well... Goodbye and Goodnight.

(I hope you all liked if u took the time to read it all)

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