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hey again.... today was naturally horrible. its been like that for a few weeks. i'm getting strange mood swings and am getting upset, and sad and happy for no reason. its mainly upset and sadness though. i am not sure why, but i dont want to look at rain anymore... i used to love the rain, but now i cant bare to look at it. its like its raining on my heart. i feel like no one understands me even though i know that there are people who do. i feel like no one cares, yet there are so many people who do. all i want to do is cry for a little, but i cant. i want let my emotions out and let everyone notice me. i just want to be different and i want to stand out. thats why i'm the way i am. i love being playful and spunky, but thats only one side of me.... and i am so stupid.... i thought that i actually might have found something that i've been looking for, but it was a lie. it wasnt true.. so i'm just wandering looking for something to make me happy and bright. i feel like my flame is exstingushed,and no one knows.
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