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My life... when my mom was pregnant she became toxoplasmosis which meant for me that I shall be physical and mental ill for all my life... fortunately I am not it takes much longer for me to gain physical abilities but I train hard to keep myself fit. nobody liked me when I was in kindergarten... I was quiet and tried to understand the chemical reactions that make life possible... so a total freak! I was there for everyone especially for those who where different or outsiders. I wanted everyone around me t be happy... even if that meant that it soon was me who was the outsider... when I came to school most people have learned how to read or write except for me... I had to start in first class but I soon learned to do it even better than all the other kids in school... I began to write stories but no one believed me that I wrote them because the language was more like an adult than child's language. some people got jealous and soon everybody hated me again and I was beaten up every afternoon...
The first big drama happened when I was 9... my parents where divorced because my father tried to kill my mom and me... I have forgiven him but he still seems to hate me for some reason I don't know. so I became quiet... and books where my only friends... I always tried to help everyone no matter how they treated me... I thought.. If my life is such a mess then I want other people around me to be happy so my life brings more luck than pain... even if not for me... the stress of almost being killed by her husband made my mother ill and very aggressive. No I had no one to be there for me when a girl entered my life who set rumors about me in school. kids can be cruel (everyone whose head was kicked by several students, other standing around, cheering, knows what I'm talking about) but I can say I never planned revenge or wish something bad would happen to them because I informed myself about the job of the preorbital cortex and that when it is destroyed people become aggressive... or maybe their life was a mess too... anyways I believed that everything that happened to me would make sense one day.
when I started my last 3 years of high school we had to sell our home and relocate because of money problems... since then I had to work for food... The first year in the new school was fun because the where some totally new subjects so I had to catch up 4 years ^^ that was a nice challenge! I even had friends then because I made everyones homework. First I thought they only liked me because of this but when they wanted me to go on parties with them and brought me cake as a thank you I knew this was the first time in my life when someone liked me! I got to know a musical director this time so it was actually fun earning money for food ^^ I was in the newspaper and the TV very often which made me quite confident!
Then we had to move again... I lost all my friend and became terribly ill... now I don't know how much time I have left and I feel strong pain everyday which almost drives me crazy.
But I always try to keep a smile on my face and all people around me very happy.