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Tonight I entertained myself by looking up different types of jokes.

First, dead baby jokes. They're so twisted and sick that it's actually funny because of thier creativity.
~Dead Baby Jokes~

Highlights:
-How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off of its head.

-What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool?
Bob

-How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.

-What's more fun than strapping a baby to a clothesline and then spinning it around at 200km/h?
Stopping it with a shovel.

-Why did the baby fall off the swing?
Because it had no arms or legs.

-What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in 1 trash can?
Finding 1 dead baby in 7 trash cans.

-What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs laying on your porch?
Matt.

-What's grosser than ten dead babies nailed to a tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten trees.

-What's grosser than gross?
A garbage can full of dead babies.

What's grosser than that?
The one at the bottom is still alive.

What's grosser than that?
He has to eat his way to freedom.

What's grosser than that?
He goes back for more.

-What sits in the kitchen and keeps getting smaller and smaller?
A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler!

-Why did the toddler drop it's lollipop?
It was hit by a truck.

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Next, the Chuck Norris jokes, which are also rediculous that they are somehow funny.

~Chuck Norris Jokes~

Highlights:

-When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

-They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take s**t from anybody.

-Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

-When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion, one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the a**, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.

-Chuck Norris once tried to wear glasses. The result was him seeing around the world to the point where he was looking at the back of his own head.

-If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the ******** down

-There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

-Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

-Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.

-Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.


-Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker’s real father.

-Chuck Norris invented water.

-Scientists in Washington have recently conceded that, if there were a nuclear war, all that would remain are cockroaches and Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

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And the invevitable,
~Yo Mama Jokes~
=To be Continued=