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Seese's random writting thing
random stuff of my life
I'm So Tired!!
Oy.. I was tired BEFORE the daylight savings time switch, and now... i feel horrrible. and to top it off i got into WoW because of my internet bf. It is a fun game but if we broke up, i dont think I'd play it anymore. The mixture of time switching, crap goin on at home, cabin fever, new bf, most likely catching the flu going around, and everything, is starting to take its toll on me. i get tired, but I never get SO tired that I feel tired All Day Long. and Ive been feeling like that for the past week or two.

Its gonna burn me out soon. i feel so exhausted that i want to cry. but I cant. because im too tired and could better use that time for sleep. Im also getting this light constant headache.
... I dont know why i seek relationships while Im having issues. it just messes up my emotions more. but its also nice to have someone to talk to. Im too independant for my own good. but I have to be independant. no one is going to get my stuff done but me. No 'god', or other person is gonna do it, its up to Me. and me alone. I think Im so used to me being like this that, Im not gonnna really except a relationship. haha, I pretty much expect myself to be like the main character off of Baby Mama. focased on her career, but wants a family eventiually. though Im not sure if i'd get that family. haha Im naturally too .. i dont know, stubborn I guess. i dont think I see relationships as positive. I almost constantly wonder if Im gonna end up like my parents relationship. which i DONT want. When i feel TOO comfortable, I'll start to panic and 'thrash' around. especiallly if its 'going too fast'. love doesnt happen right now, it happens and grows over time.

i dont know... Im just not feeling well. Im too tired. i dont wanna be in limbo anymore.. but nothing in this world is perfect, i accept that. I know that. haha, "lifes a b***h. if it were easy it'd be a ho."
and no not everything is negative for me right now. there are many positive things. Im just not feeling good, so im focasing on the negative.
Its my vent time right now.





 
 
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