|
|
|
Well ladies and gentlemen, it’s finally happened. The time is 8:19P.M. on February 12lf , 2009. No, not the apocalypse, silly, the cable company finally wised up and turned off my free Internet. You see, a while ago, we couldn’t afford the cable bills, so our T.V. and phones got turned off, but by some stroke of luck, our Internet remained untouched. Unfortunately, since the whole conversion in to digital T.V. happens some time this month (I forget when), they went around checking all of the boxes in our area, while at the same time offering cable to those who had none. This means they spotted their screw up, and fixed it. My dearest apologies to my fellow Role Players, I won’t get Internet back for a while, even when I get cable again, Internet is expensive, and we can’t afford it. My apologies to any friends who were expecting to do something online with me (whoever you are, since I made no such arrangements), but most of all, I want to apologize to certain young woman. Mary, I’m very sorry, but we won’t be able to talk for a while. You can still E-Mail me, since the school doesn’t block Yahoo, but I won’t have very much access to the computers, at least, not to often. I can’t express how sorry I am, not in simple written, or rather typed, words. At the moment, this particular entry is being typed in my Microsoft Word on my desktop, so I know none of you will be able to comment when it’s still relevant. This Journal started on my desktop, so it only makes sense that it should continue on it. All of the entries I make during my exile from the Internet will be placed in a bulk entry on Gaia, like the very first Gaia entry I made, so pay attention to the dates I put into these things when you read that super entry! For those of you who still wish to contact me, I will place my E-Mail address up once I change the name on my account, since I now realize that it was kinda stupid of me to use my real name on it. You know what I would find hilarious? I always refer to my ‘readers’, I assume there’s more than just pinkjazzykats. But wouldn’t it just be a regular hoot if she were the only one who actually read these? Apart from my brother of course, but he’s an a**, so he doesn’t count. Hmmmm…. should I put anything else in here? Not at the moment, no. I can’t think of what to type, so I suppose I’ll be signing off. The time is 8:37P.M. on February 12lf , 2009.
I Curse Charter! I Curse It To The Bowels Of Hell!
PS: I love you Mary! Since I’m using your real name, and not your username, it’s okay to say this sort of thing where people can see it, right?
PPS: Since this on my desktop, I can put it in Monotype Crosiva, and I will! ‘Cause I like the way it looks! Shame you won’t see it, real shame.
Huh. The time is 8:44P.M. on February 12lf , 2009. I just realized that without the Internet, I really don’t have much use for my computer. I wonder what this says about me? Odd. The time is 8:47P.M. on February 12th , 2009.
I’m Bored Now…
I might have a rash. The time is 9:31P.M. on February 12th, 2009. I noticed when I got out of the shower, some scattered bits of red on my chest. It’s probably nothing, but you never know. Have you read anything by Mercedes Lacky? You should. I highly recommend her. Her crowning achievement is the Heralds of Valdemar series, which encompasses many, many books. I haven’t read all of them yet, but I will start on that as soon as I pay my Library bills. She also works with co-authors on things like the Elven Bane series, the Obsidian Trilogy, and the Enduring Flame trilogy. She’s written some other books not related to anything I have mentioned, but I kind of shied away from those. I’m not sure why, I just didn’t like the looks of them. Wow, how did I go from a possible rash to Mercedes Lacky? Weird… Well, I’m tapped for stuff to type, so… yeah. The time is 9:38P.M. on February 12th, 2009.
I Wants My Internets!
An interesting question has come to my mind. The time is 10:04P.M. on February 12th, 2009. How do authors get their money when they use a pen name? For those who don’t know, a pen name is a pseudonym some one uses when publishing a written work. For instance, if I wrote a book, but didn’t want people to know that I was the one who wrote it, I would use a pen name like… oh, I don’t know, Robert Kentle (That’s not my name!). I mean, how would it get to them? Would they open a special bank account just for that persona? Is that legal? It’s a very interesting conundrum for those who don’t know, namely myself! The time is 10:09 razz .M. on February 12th, 2009.
How Do They Do It?
I am wet. The time is 3:41P.M. on February 13th, 2009. It rained today. The significance to this, is that I walk home. Now, I’m not stupid enough to walk home in the rain when I know it’s coming, but it started raining when I was half-way there. Recently, I’ve brought an umbrella with me to school, but it didn’t look like it was going to rain today, so I didn’t. Note to self: DO NOT become a weather man, I will be lynched. I started to read a web comic today. I know, it seems like that’s all I do. Anyway, I started to read one at school, it’s called Ctrl+Alt+Del, and it’s pretty funny. To be honest, I think it’s kinda how my brother wants our web comic to be like. As I have said before, I highly recommend it. While the school blocks Gaia, it doesn’t block most web comic sites, so I can still keep up with most of them, except for the ones on fireball20xl, which sucks, ‘cause they were some of the first web comics I read. PAA (Project ARMS Abridged) is going to be having a bit of filler for an episode or two. It’s really just going to be a bunch of skits n’ s**t…. Swearing is fun. Tee-Hee! Well, my brother has distracted me enough that I can’t think of anything else to put, oh well. The time is 3:56P.M. on February 13th, 2009.
I Can Make Weird Noises! YAY!
RAWRGH! The time is 11:09P.M. on February 13th, 2009. Dear God, I’m so bored! The book I’m reading, Crusader, is giving me a bad vibe, so it will take me a while to finish it. When I say bad vibe, I mean I get a funny feeling in the pit of my stomach, I can’t really describe it better than that, so you’ll have to bear with me. Anyways, it’s giving me the same vibe as another book I read, End Game, and let me tell you, I hated that book! The ending was so obvious, the main character never caught a break, it just wasn’t a good read. I read books to get away from real life, so I have no idea what people get a kick out of ‘realistic’ novels. You know what the funny thing is? It was a New York Best Seller. What’s weirder than that though is that I don’t think I’ve ever read a book that wasn’t. It’s not that I actively seek out Best Sellers or something, it’s just that I’ve never read, or seen for that matter, one that wasn’t… How difficult is it to get on the New York Best Seller list anyway? The book, Crusader, at the moment has two characters in it who just piss me off so much, I just want to reach in there wring their overly made-up necks… A little violent, I know, but true, I hate those kinds of people. When I say ‘those kind of people’ I mean women who spend more money on clothes than on food, who care more about the opinions of complete strangers than the feelings of their so-called ‘friends’. The kind of people who wear so much make up, that you just know they think they’re absolutely hideous underneath it. So much, that you question how many years ago it was they saw their real face? I can’t sleep because of that feeling! It’s driving me nuts! I really hope that Crusader ends better than End Game. You know, an actual happy ending would be wonderful right about now. Bad endings just make me feel so tired. Like nothing I do actually does anything. I mean, I know that’s true in most respects anyway, but usually it doesn’t get to me like this. *Sigh *……. I’m going to try to sleep again. The time is 11:24P.M. on February 13th, 2009.
Now That I think About It, My Troubles Are Very Small In The Eyes Of The World. Are Yours?
I’m sick and tired. The time is 9:52A.M. on February 14th, 2009. I’m sick because it’s relatively cold, and I’m tired because I just woke up. What? Were you expecting a Samuel Jackson reference? Anyway, It’s Valentine’s Day, and I am alone, sick, and cold. The one person whom I want to be with, I have no way of contacting her. I hope she’s having a better time than I am. Happy Valentine’s Day love! You know who you are, and you know that I love you. In a few minutes, I’m going to try and cajole my brother into making bacon. Wish me luck! Let’s see, was there anything else I wanted to say? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Not that I can think of. Oh well. The time is 9:57 A.M. on February 14th , 2009.
‘I, As A Boy, I Thought The Same, The Cure For Pain Was Love’. For That Matter, I Still Do!
I should feel grateful. The time is 10:34P.M. on February 14th, 2009. I feel like an a**. I’ve had a thought, and as I continue to think about it, the worse I feel. The thought is, I wish I had some one to love. The reason I feel bad, is because I do. But she’s so far away, she’s practically intangible. I can see her, I can hear her, but I can’t touch her. It’s like she’s standing but a few feet away, and I can almost reach, almost, so close! But just before I can grab her hand, or kiss her lips, she vanishes. When the day is done, it’s as though I was in a dream, like she was never real. I’m sorry. I should be happy that you even return my feelings, but I can’t help it! I’m a terrible person… The time is 10:40P.M. on February 14th, 2009.
Why Must I Always Want More?
It’s incredible. The time is 4:42A.M on February 15th, 2009. What’s incredible, you ask? Why, Crusader! That book is amazing! It’s wonderful, beautiful, it almost brought me to tears three times! Again, the book is Crusader by Edward Bloor. Please read it. It’s thought provoking, funny, sad, heart warming; everything I could ever want in a book was there! I like to think my reviews matter, since I don’t do much else but read, especially now that I don’t actually have anything else to do. I can’t tell you the whole story, or even the plot, mostly because I think this is one of the very few that I would hate to spoil for you, but I can say this: You will be shocked. Extremely shocked at the end. The middle to, for that matter, hell, you’ll be surprised for the whole thing! If this were a baseball game, every hit would be soaring into left field! It’s just, just…. Wow! Read Crusader, that’s all I ask of you, who ever you may be, read the book! The time is 4:50A.M. on February 15th, 2009.
I Finished The Book At Roughly 4:20A.M., But I Didn’t Make An Entry Right Away For Some Reason... Oh Well, Least It Got In.
I’m very sick and tired. The time is 10:02P.M. on February 15th, 2009. When I woke up today, I felt even worse than yesterday. My throat hurt, my chest was congested, all sorts of nastiness in my throat, it was awful. I feel better now, though I don’t know if that will last into tomorrow. I certainly hope it does, I have school. I feel I should say more, but I don’t want to start publicly insulting a thirteen-year-old. My brother and me are bad around kids, according to him. And I quote: ‘I hate kids and you’re just stupid.’ Unfortunately, he’s probably right. I am not good around kids, and I know I’d make a terrible dad, that’s why I’m probably not going to have any if I ever get into some kind of serious relationship, again, another unlikely event. Well, I’m going to go diving through my change jar, which is a jug from a water cooler, and fish out two quarters. The time is 10:18P.M. on February 15th, 2009.
I Need To Sleep.
Good news everyone! The time is 3:23P.M. on February 16th, 2009. Anyway, I found my dad, well my step-dad, well my ex-step-dad’s Mega Mix! This has no impact any of your lives what so ever, but it’s good news for me! I love the songs on there, most of them are from the 80’s, but in my mind, that just makes them better. Some of the best music came out of the eighties, although, their clothing could have been better. Ha ha, humor. By the by, I might write a book… eventually. I have some ideas brewing in my head. On a side note, my brother is both weird and strange. Really, he is. He thinks I have some kind of terrettes(my Word doesn’t know how to properly spell this, and neither do I!) because I spasmodically clear my throat while talking. I will admit, I do this often, but I just think it means I have some crap in my throat, not some mental imbalance. Personally, I think he’s some kind of idiot. Well, now that he’s entrenched himself in my door way, I can’t think of anything else of substance to put in here, so I suppose it’s fare well. The time is 3:43P.M. on February 16th, 2009.
Why Won’t He Shut Up!?
It’s hot. The time is 9:09P.M. on February 17th, 2009. I feel really hot right now. Probably something to do with me being sick, I don’t know. I’m a bit worried; online girlfriend has yet to reply to my E-Mail. I might be a bit paranoid, but can you blame me? I’m a desperate and lonely young man, in his first relationship! Okay, maybe I’m pushing it a bit, but still, I am a bit worried. Europe is a great band. One of the best songs ever is Final Countdown, which I’m now listening to. I strongly urge you to listen to it! Also, school news here, I’m pulling my act together! I know it’s late in the game, but I’m doing it! As soon as I’m finished with this entry, I’m gonna do my French home work. What else did I want to talk about? Uhhhhhhhh………… Damnit! I can’t remember. The time is 9:20P.M. on February 17th, 2009.
And Here I Thought I Was Gonna Make One Of Those Long, Heartfelt Entries.
Wonderful news every one! The time is 9:06P.M. on February 19th, 2009. My brother managed to cash his Income Tax check! That means he has a s**t-load o’ money now! And I know damn well that he’s going to buy Internet with it, as well as maybe phone service for us! It is as I have prophesized my children, the time of Reconnection is almost upon us! Rejoice, for I shall join you soon, and I shall be glad of the reunion that I shall have with many of you, especially you, yes, you. You know who you are dear. At the moment, I’m playing KOTOR(Knights Of The Old Republic). A particularly fun Star Wars RP game which I have already beaten. ‘But why,’ you may ask, ‘Why would you be playing a game you already beat?’ Well the thing is, I beat it as a Sith Lord last time, and this time, I want to beat it as a Jedi. I’m so far into the light side of the spectrum, that when I check, I have a ********’ pillar of light surrounding me! I’m more light-side-y than the other Jedi in my party! It’s funny when you think about it, actually. I wrote a soliloquy the other day, and read it aloud today in English class. It was about my feelings for a certain special someone, and was, shall we say, well received. I’m going to present it to the person it’s about soon, I hope she likes it. The time is 9:17P.M. on February 19th, 2009.
I Can’t Wait For Internets!
Oh cruel fait! The time is 5:08P.M. on February 20th, 2009. I have to suffer through a week of no school (means no Internet, nor access to a library, and I have to be in close proximity to the idiot leaning over my shoulder, reading what I’m typing, and laughing like a moron, my brother, well, he’s not over my shoulder, but you get the idea) And I barely got to use the school computers at lunch today, so I have no idea what some responses to my E-Mails are, or read many web comics. Have I told you about Ctrl+Alt+Del? Yes, yes I have, you should read it. The time is 5:23P.M. on February 20th, 2009.
I Really, REALLY Want Internet!
PS: What my brother gets in his check will get us about 4 months of internet at first.
I’m a little creeped out. The time is 11:58P.M. on February 21st, 2009. About ten minutes ago, my fridge, or rather something inside it, knocked. Knocked! Fridges don’t do that! And last I check, neither do cold cuts… My brother says it’s the glass condiment bottles in the door when it turns on, but I don’t know. Call me superstitious, but I’m paranoid… Or something. I ******** hate him, does he know that? The time is 12:05A.M. on February 22nd, 2009.
I Meant My Brother.
Terrible ending, terrible grammar, why do I like it so much? The time is 7:30P.M. on February 22nd, 2009. I’m talking, of course, about Firestorm, a book by a man named Klass. Every sentence, or at least, almost every sentence, is a fragment. You have no idea how annoying that is to me. I mean, this guy isn’t some teenager online writing things that only a few people will read, he wrote a book, that thousands will read. I mean, come on! He didn’t have Word? They have grammar check you know! The endings awful to, the love interest and the best friend vanish, while the main character is swept away by the wind some where over Europe. What the ********? Now, I suppose this can be excused since it’s the first book in a trilogy, but what with my limited library options and all, you can understand why I’m all upset. All in all though, I think it’s a good book. I’m going to be making the journey to the Public Library tomorrow; hopefully my bill won’t interfere with my access to the computer room. With luck, I’ll get to see how my soliloquy was received, and then apologize for my absence over the weekend, and catch up on my Web Comics. If not, well, I’m royally ********, eh? FYI, I’ll be walking to the library, and it might take me an hour to get there, maybe more, maybe less, I don’t know. I’ve never made the walk from here to there before. Well, I’m hungry, and bored, so I’ll make an egg sandwich and watch the last DVD of the second season of M*A*S*H. In my highly repetitive words, I highly recommend it. It’s funny as hell, really. Watch it. The time is 7:41P.M. on February 22nd, 2009.
NOW!
I feel good. The time is 12:40P.M. on February 24th, 2009. Yesterday, I went to the Public Library, and got some much needed, filter free Internet. And guess what? Turns out my bill is only like, $10.50! That’s for three books a month late. And here I thought it was three times that much. Isn’t that funny? Also, she loved the soliloquy. Not only that, she’s bragging about me! How cool is that? Since she’s bragging about me, I feel much more comfortable talking to you, the anonymous reader, about her. As you have no doubt deduced, unless you’re ‘special’, I love her. ‘Her’ would be Mary Chandler, or, as I first knew her, pinkjazzykats. Well, now that I’ve given you that tender glimpse into my love life, here’s some news you might enjoy. We finally have a concrete idea for the comic! It’s going to be a kind of Star Wars-ian thing; I think it has great potential. Eventually, we plan to drift away from Star Wars and make it more casual and funny (mostly so we don’t get sued too badly). I’m writing for it, and I think I have the first issue done, all I have to do is wait for my brother(the artist for the comic)’s approval, and a tablet, and we can begin. Before we get a tablet though, we need my mom to get him and ID, which we need a birth certificate for. All in all, it will be difficult, but hey, we’ll get there some day. I’d be at the library today, but it’s Mardi Gras, and the library is closed because the parade rout is so close to it. Besides, who wants to go to a library when they could be drunk? Besides me? No one, that’s who! Oh well, I still have another book I can read. The time is 12:55P.M. on February 24th, 2009.
My Back Hurts.
Odd. The time is 1:16P.M. on February 24th, 2009. I actually noticed this a while ago, but I keep forgetting to get it on here. Some time ago, I noticed that I had developed a limp. I have never been in an accident serious enough to cause one, hell; I’ve never been in anything worse than a scraped knee. It’s not like it’s a big limp, but I can feel it as I walk around the trailer. Also, my left leg seems to be longer than my right. Either that, or my pants are faulty. In short, I think my legs are ******** up, just not that much. The time is 1:19P.M. on February 24th, 2009.
What Is That Smell?
Again with the late entries! The time is 6:50P.M. on February 24th, 2009. He liked the comic script! Now, all we need is a tablet and we’re in business. He read it a while ago, but I forgot to make an entry. Yeah though, I think this is funny, I’m sure you will to. We haven’t thought of a name yet, but it’s going to be making fun of most Sci-Fi things, and any help would be appreciated. In other news, I burned my wrist, and it really hurts. Ow. I’m going to the library tomorrow, check my E-Mails, all that stuff. The time is 6:56P.M. on February 24th, 2009.
OW!
Uhhh, sorry for the delay. The time is 10:15P.M. on February 27th, 2009. I just didn’t really know what to type, is all. Uh, I finished catching up on Ctrl+Alt+Del! Funny comic, did not expect that near the end. It’s not over, no, it’s just, now I’m waiting for the next update, like every one else. Uh, oh, here’s one I should’ve mentioned a while back, before I lost internet, hell, I should’ve said it last year. Me and friend, Jeremiah(If that’s how you spell it, I’m never sure) have acquired a few hand signals that must be used when saying certain words. These signals came about through various funny means, and there are only a few. For instance, we have one for Trachea, that was the first one, I started it too! Anyway, the story is, I was trying to tell him something, and for some reason(I can’t remember) and I had to use the word ‘trachea’. I couldn’t remember it right then, so I made a hand motion towards the collection of blood vessels in question a few times, and then said trachea. From then on, anytime either of us said the word trachea, we make the same motion I used. I’m not going to describe it, since I’m terrible at descriptions. We also have one for power, and I’ve just thought of one for library and I will show him on Monday when school is back in session. At any rate, that’s pretty much it. The time is 10:24P.M. on February 27th, 2009.
Good Night, And Good Fight!
Several things have come to my attention. The time is 10:29P.M. on March 7th, 2009. I know, I’ve used that opener before, but it still applies in this situation, damn it. First off, something to aid in your mental picture of myself; in an earlier entry I said that had recently discovered that I was attractive. I now would like to rescind that statement and replace it with this one: I am not ugly. Although I am not ugly, I am not hot, just well, moderately cute. I mean, I have been called hot by one girl, and one girl only, and I am very flattered by it, but I still my opinion of myself is rather low. I mean, my nose points to the right of my face, and my right eye kind of droops down a little. Did I mention that my right ear is lower than my left? And that I can’t hear out of it? Also, I have a strange, phantom limp. It moves around from leg to leg every now and then, and I can’t really feel it unless I try too, but it’s definitely there. Now, on to other matters; we might be moving. My mother goes to the interview to see if she’s eligible to become a tenant. The time is 11:39P.M., no it’s not over yet, but my brother took me away for like and hour, sorry. Anyways, that means there is a slight chance that we might move. This won’t really change anything but the direction I walk to school, and I might get internet a week later than I thought. I would say more, but my brother, whose name is Mason, AKA Lord Itory on Gaia, has used his VooDoo powers and made me forget what it was.. No, wait, I remember the other things I was going to say. Right, well, remember when I said that soliloquy I wrote was well received? Well, let’s just say it was very well received. With the emphasis on very. Also, I will be making a concerted effort to bring my grades up with hopes of somehow making it into a college out of state, I won’t specify which one though. Also, there is a slight chance that I will be getting a visit from a very special some one during the summer, and there is also a very miniscule chance, so small it’s on the very limits of possibility, that I will end up living with her in a few years. This has made me very happy, very happy indeed. I’m sure there was more, but I’m having trouble seeing through all the red aimed at my brother. That summer visit might have to be done from the other side of a prison cell, ‘cause I might end up killing him, because he won’t LEAVE ME ALONE!!! The time is 11:53P.M. on March 7th, 2009.
Oy!
Oooookaaay…. The time is 9:30P.M. on March 8th, 2009. My computer just did something weird, and for a moment I was worried that I lost the Journal, but I fixed it, sort of. Anyway, onto the reason I made this entry; I’m going to start a regimen. A cleaning regimen. I will shave every Sunday, shower every other day, and brush my teeth once a day, every day (this is a big step up from never brushing, so don’t get on my case about it!). I will be doing better in school, or may I be struck by lightning. So help me God, I will turn my life around! The time is 9:35P.M. on March 8th, 2009.
Wish Me Luck!
God. ********. Damn. It. The time is 11:26A.M. on March 14th, 2009. I would be at the library right now, but my mom is scared I’ll get wet. I will admit that the sky is rather cloudy and it did rain earlier today, but frankly, I’m still pissed off, and I’ll tell you why. Yesterday, while I was at the library, Mary told me that she already had a boyfriend, his name is Charles. She said that she could see living with me, but not with him, but she still loved him. She was worried that dear Charley now hated her, and that I would too. I told I could never hate her, and that is the truth, I assure you. I still love her, and I still want to be with her. But I was angry at her for not telling me sooner. Anyway, I told her I would talk to her today, but now I can’t do that. With her, rather, shall we say, ‘temperamental tendencies’, I worry about how she’ll take my absence. That, and I now have to spend the whole day with my brother, whom I hate. In case any of you are interested in helping lighten my load as it were, his name is Mason, and his Gaia name is Lord Itory. Proceed with the flaming at your earliest convenience. The time is 11:33A.M. on March 14th, 2009.
*Expletive Deleted*!
Sigh. The time is 8:12P.M. on March 17th, 2009. This entry is not about me, not even really about anything that should be able to physically affect me. But it is about something that preys on my mind even now, although I have known about it since yesterday. This information is not sensitive to the passage of time, and no matter how much I think about it, I’m afraid I’m just not a good enough politician to put a good spin on it, at least, not to myself. As you know from my last entry, the woman I love has recently informed me that she has another man. Even more recently, however, she has given me more information. As it turns out, she sees no real future with him, and she admittedly thinks he is a jerk, but she loves him all the same, and has told me it’s an open kind of relationship, and apparently, they both let each other see other people. Personally, since she tells me she has never been kissed, I think it might be something some thing closer to a brother-sister relationship than anything else. At any rate, due to my frosty response, at least in my belief, she has begun down a path of self-destruction as a kind of penitence. I have tried to sway her to the contrary, telling her that it didn’t matter to me, and really, it doesn’t. This might be seen as a weakness on my part, but I think differently than most people, I believe in ‘Forgive And Forget’, even if I don’t believe in much else. But it doesn’t matter to her. I won’t disclose what it was she told me she was doing to herself, because I don’t think she would want many people to know, but suffice it to say that it’s enough to make me very, very upset. I cannot help but feel that if I had shown up on Saturday, this wouldn’t have happened. Sigh… I apologize for pouring my burdens on you, whomever you may be, but I fear you are the only one (or ones) who will ever know of these innermost thoughts of mine, and so I bring you one final piece, one final fear that I have only minutes ago admitted to myself. It is my greatest fear that this romance of mine will go up in flames, that something will happen to Mary before I ever get a chance to see her, to hold her, to kiss her. What we have is precious, but oh so fragile. It has been said, many times in my memory that ‘long distance relationships never last’. I fear they may be right. When I say ‘I fear’, I mean I am truly terrified that I will lose her before I can actually do anything. The time is 8:32P.M. on March 17th, 2009.
I’m So Scared.
Once again, I’m late. The time is 8:05P.M. on March 21st, 2009. A couple of things have happened lately that I have forgotten to put in here when they were still relevant. The first, both in a chronological sense, and it’s the more important of the two, is that Mary went into surgery to remove her gallbladder on, I think it was Tuesday. Anyway, she’s in a lot of pain, I wish I could be there for her, but what can I do? Send her a bottle of aspirin? No, all I can do is sit in front of this goddamned machine and wish. I hate being poor… The second piece of news, although nowhere near as important as Mary’s health, concerns me more directly. As I as walking to my trailer after school on Friday, some one who rides the bus that picks up from my trailer park (yes, I could ride the bus if I wanted, I just don’t) came up to me and told me, “There’s a girl back there who likes you.” By ‘back there’, he meant a small tin shed where people wait for the bus in the mornings. Naturally, what with my overactive imagination, and my bibliophilia to fuel it, I was instantly suspicious, so I called what I believed to be his bluff and kept walking. I must admit, I am curious to see who this mystery girl is, if she does exist, for she would have only seen me as I walked by, she wouldn’t know me at all, which means that she would want to meet me because of my looks alone. You have no idea how flattering this would be if it were true. The time is 8:16P.M. on March 21st, 2009.
Get Well Soon Love!
Some things today. The time is 6:50P.M., on March 18th, 2009. This morning, my foot hurt. More on that later, but first, I think I had a vision. Chances are it wouldn’t be categorized as a ‘Vision’ per say, since it was really just an overly artistic view of my current state of mind brought on by a combination of boredom, over active imagination, and really good music. Anyways, here’s the skinny; First, I saw myself, dancing Waltzing with a beautiful woman. Now, I take it for granted that she’s beautiful, since I never saw her face, but that’s not the point, the point it, I was Waltzing with a beautiful woman. Well, maybe it wasn’t me exactly, but it was definitely representing me, that much I can say for certain. Next, I saw my self fencing with an invisible enemy. I don’t mean some sissy contest with flexible blunt metal rods, no, I mean with a saber. While I never saw the opponent, I did see the tip of his sword, so yeah. Third, I saw my self playing a violin, writing a book, and painting a beautiful picture. Not all at once, mind you, but not exactly one after another either. It was in that seemingly seamless, flowing motion that dreams carry between actions, where you can never really tell when something starts or ends. Fourth, I saw myself, or at least my representation, traveling. Now, this alone might seem rather unimpressive to you, but to me, it was very moving, because he (or is it I?) was traveling between worlds. And not just any worlds, all worlds, worlds of my making, worlds of others, world’s I’ve never in my wildest dreams imagined. And the last figure was not just some representation, for you see, I never clearly saw the faces of the others, but I did notice they were all dressed differently. I won’t elaborate since I can’t remember just how they were dressed, but suffice it to say, they were very fitting outfits to there rolls. But the fifth figure, was not really doing anything, and he was dressed exactly as I was this morning. He was sitting, in a very ornate throne, and he wore a crown that at first glance was a very simple golden, bland, band around the fore head, but as I concentrated on that light shimmer about his brow, it grew into a very ornate, very decorated crown. Though it was fashioned in a way that might seem gaudy on anyone, it strangely seemed to fit this young man, who was undoubtedly me. Any way, the first four figures suddenly appeared around him (me), but I (he) didn’t look up at them, though he (I) did look up, and I looked into my own eyes, behind my glasses I saw that they were tired, weary of ruling his four region kingdom of baron desert that was the landscape through out the whole day dream that represented my mind.
And then it was gone.
Anyway, about that pain in the ankle I mentioned at the beginning of this strange odyssey of an entry. The pain eventually moved into my knee, and then my lower thigh. I’m worried it will progress up my left side until it reaches my head, where it will either give me a head ache and fade, or make my skull implode. The time is 7:17P.M., on March 2009.
‘What The Hell Has He Been Smoking?’ Is Probably What You’re Thinking, Isn’t It?
Well, this is odd. The time is 1:47A.M. on March 27th, 2009. I can’t seem to sleep, so I suppose I ‘l make an entry. About that ache I mentioned earlier, it never got past the lower thigh, and has been gone for some time. In other news, that supposedly interested ‘lady’ has not resurfaced and I am strong in the belief that she never existed, so that’s the end of that. More recently, I just saw a movie called ‘Arsenic and Old Lace’, and I’m telling you, you would just love it. It’s so goddamned funny, it’ll make you as loony as any of the Broosters (the family name of the main characters, well, most of them, anyway watch the movie, and what I just said will make a lot more sense). It was based of a play, and I’m going to see if I can’t convince my High School theater teacher to do a rendition of it.
And now for something completely different. This is a matter that weighs heavily on my heart, even though I’ve only come to think of it a few minutes ago, when I was struck by that sudden clarity of mind that staying up for too long temporarily gives you. I’m worried that, since I can’t keep up a good, healthy correspondence with Mary (I can’t get to the library in this weather!), and I’ve only sent her one, rather poor picture of myself (I don’t have a camera!), and I can’t even call her (no phones in the house!), and what with this recent operation, I think she’s going through a lot of pain, no, I know she’s going through pain, and I can’t support her properly (or at least, as I properly as I should be able to from half a continent away!). I’m a little scared that she might not see our relationship as meaningful as I do anymore… I do love her, you know? I shouldn’t suspect her of falling out of love with me without due cause, but, I can’t help but think, that, what with her rather pessimistic E-Mails lately, that she’s just going through the motions, and dropping slight hints that, that… I don’t know. I just feel so useless. In case you were wondering, the inclement weather that’s been keeping me from the library all week but Monday has been an almost unending series of thunderstorms. The funny thing is, it’s always raining on Prom Night here, and Prom is this Friday, or is it Saturday? The point is, it’ll be raining. Also, just another fact about my personal life, I haven’t been asked to Prom. Hell, I probably wouldn’t have gone anyway. At least, not stag, and I certainly couldn’t pay for the tickets ($50 for a single & $75 for a date pass!), or a shell out the money to rent a tux. I may have beautiful words and the voice of an angel when the mood strikes, but I’d be terrible for the position of boyfriend from almost any aspect of the word. The only thing I’m good at is the one thing I can’t do for the one person who I know for a fact needs it the most right now. (For those who don’t know, I was referring to A) Emotional support & B) Mary.) The time is 2:08A.M. on March 27th, 2009.
I’m Tempted To Risk Pneumonia To Get To That Library, And The Only Thing Stopping Me, Is That If I Go, And Get Sick Now, I Won’t Be Able To Go Saturday, Which Is Virtually Assured!
I went, I bought a ******** load of video games, I went somewhere else, got lonely, then I went home to play those games. The time is 1:41A.M. on March 29th, 2009. That opener was supposed to be a play on ‘I came, I saw, I conquered’, but I kind of ******** it up with length and all. It’s true I did go buy a bunch of games, and then go to the library, where I got lonely ‘cause no one was on, and then I went home and played those games. All in all, I think, aside from the lonely bit, the day was rather pleasant. Can’t think of much else to put here… except that Advent Rising is a pretty fun game. The time is 1:45A.M. on March 29th, 2009.
Why Do I Keep Staying Up So Late? (Or Is It Early?)
Hello all! The time is 10:01P.M. on April 2nd, 2009. No, I didn’t do an April Fool’s joke, deal with it. Tropic Thunder is a very funny movie. I bet you didn’t know that Tom Cruise is in it. I’d also bet that you wouldn’t be able to pick him out until you saw the end credits either. It’s ********’ awesome. You will laugh. A lot. Also, I might be writing something, at some point soon. Not a novel, not even a short story, but something. The time is 10:04P.M. on April 2nd, 2009.
My head itches.
Mozart. ******** YEAH! The time is 9:48P.M. on April 6th, 2009. I really shouldn’t have to elaborate on that Mozart statement, but anyways, I went to the library today (if you hadn’t noticed, I go almost every day) and listened to most of Wolfgang’s unfinished Requiem. And words cannot describe it. ********. Yeah. I meant to make an entry yesterday, but for various reasons didn’t, so I’ll post the pertaining knowledge now. I went to the library, but the Internet in their computer lab cut out at around 3:30. Not only that, but I was right in the middle of a conversation with Mary, one that might have become very interesting indeed, if ya know what I mean. But… what’s done is done. Uhhh…. crap. I was gonna type more, I know it! Oh well. The time is 9:53P.M. on April 6th, 2009.
If You Don’t Like Mozart, Kiss My a**.
Sorry everyone. The time is 5:33P.M. on April 12th, 2009. A couple of things, again. I haven’t made an entry before now, mostly because I didn’t feel like it, partly because I’ve had to baby sit, again. I didn’t go to the library all weekend, and I am very unhappy about it. I didn’t go Friday ‘cause it was Good Friday and the library was closed, I didn’t go Saturday ‘cause I had to baby sit, even though my mom said that she would pick him up in the morning, it was well after they closed before she even came home. I didn’t go today (Sunday) because, A) it’s Easter, and B) the library’s closed on Sunday’s anyway. Also, I rented The Force Unleashed, which is a very good game; I suggest you get it too. Don’t get the PS2 version though, the graphics are bad, and there’s a lot of missing content only available on the next gen systems. Which pisses me off, ‘cause I don’t have a next en system. Oh, point of interest, I’ve started a book, it’s not even four pages in yet though, so don’t expect anything soon. I won’t even tell you the title, and I don’t have much of a synopsis, except for two or three key events, so don’t ask for spoilers, ‘cause they don’t exist yet. I started on it, I think yesterday, either very early yesterday, or very late the day before, I can’t quite remember. Second point of interest, my brother has gotten his slimy hands on a DSi, the next step in Nintendo hand-held. It’s pretty cool to; it has a camera, SD card slot, built in Internet access (still needs an Internet connection though, so don’t get any ideas), and a store from which you can buy downloadable games. Well, that’s it for today I guess. The time is 5:49P.M. on April 12th, 2009.
I Have All Week Off Of School!
Markers, the poor mans rapier. The time is 5:55P.M. on April 16th, 2009. I just got through a big marker battle with my brother, and since I jabbed him a little to hard in the neck, (yes, I finally stabbed the b*****d, right in the neck!) I let him draw on my face, now I look like a bad clown. That’s it for now. The time is 6:00P.M. on April 16th, 2009.
Now He Won’t Shut Up About Grammar.
Celebrate good times come on! The time is 1:53A.M. on April 18th, 2009. Seriously, bust out the champagne and party poppers people! I just finished the first chapter of my book! You will bow before me now; worship me as though I were a god! ******** yes; you have no idea how awesome this feel! If I like the taste alcohol, I would be getting drunk right now. Dmanit, the one time I want my brother here, he’s over at a friends’ house! Who am I supposed to gloat at? Woohoo! The time is 1:56A.M. on April 18th, 2009.
It Feels Good To Create, Don’t It?
Why didn’t I do this before? The time is 2:05A.M. on April 18th, 2009. A while ago, my brother suggested that I put my Journal (this thing) onto CD and take it to the library, where I would place it on Gaia. I’ve just now decided that this was a good idea. Come Monday, you will all be reading of my adventures once more. Rejoice! The time is 2:07A.M. on April 18th, 2009.
No, I Don’t Have Internet Yet, Sorry.
I’m not quite sure how to deal with this last week. The time is 8:17P.M. on April 23rd, 2009. Some really weird things have happened. On Monday, I was pulled over by the cops for ‘looking suspicious’. Someone had called in a report about someone matching my description as looking suspicious, so they stopped me, frisked me, ascertained that I was not in fact, suspicious, and sent me on my merry way. This led directly to my library embarrassment on Wednesday, when I had thought I forgot my card. In reality, when the cop had looked through my wallet, he had taken out my card and put it back in the wrong place, underneath another card. This pissed me off because I couldn’t pick up something I had ordered and out on reserve. And today, well, today has just been plain ********’ weird maaaaaaaan. I got a note, I’m going to put it here for you to see, and make your own opinions on its validity. My good friend, Sir Rainbow, tells me that the writers are probably, no, definitely screwing with me. And I happen to agree, but if they weren’t, well, my self confidence would sky rocket. Here’s the note:
Baby (my name goes here, but you don’t get to know it!):
When I look into your eyes, I can’t stop staring. You’re the light to my fire. I (Here they actually drew a heart) the way you move your lips when you read those books. Me and (Insert one of the senders names here, their privacy will be respected) want to take you to the locker-room and teach you a thing or two.
Love you baby; (Name and Name)
The part in bold is what gives it away, although the fact that the two of them seem to be willing to share me is a dead give away as well. Anyway, during the only hour I have with them, (yes, they actually handed me this note, it wasn’t some kind of secret thing) nobody looks into my eyes, let alone stares. I bet they couldn’t even get the color right. In other news, Mary seems to be on the upswing from her depression, taking pills and therapists and such. I don’t like the pill bit, but if it helps, hey, works for me. Anything for her to be happy. Lately though, I’ve been having a lot of strange thoughts. Do you think she’s really happy loving a guy she doesn’t even have a picture of? (Through no fault of mine, I still haven’t been able to get it to her) I get the feeling that I might be holding her down. I’ll ask her tomorrow to be sure. Oh, and I changed my mind about getting this on disk and to the library for my Gaia journal. Alright, I haven’t, but I keep forgetting. If I remember, I might do it. MAYBE! I dunno… The time is 8:35P.M. on April 23rd, 2009.
I’m So Confused…
New AC. The time is 9:09P.M. on May 2nd, 2009. We got a new air conditioner for the living room. The only reason we need a new one, is because I accidentally pushed the old one out the window when I tried to remove it before hurricane Gustav hit. Anyway, the thing is, the vent that pushes cold air into the room, is angled upwards, with no option for re-angling it. So all the cold air gets shot behind the blinds! The time is 9:12P.M. on May 2nd, 2009.
Soooooooo Tired…
I saved a tortoise. The time is 5:58P.M. on May 15th, 2009. Yes folks, a tortoise was nearly run over today, but, as I was walking along the high way to the library, I saw it. It was one the shoulder, just about to go into the rod. To tell the truth, it looked rather indecisive about going. Anyway, I picked it up before it could kill itself and carried it to safety. Aren’t I sweet? Sorry I haven’t made an entry in while, but I just didn’t feel like it. Oh, remember along, long, loooooooong time ago when I told you that Mary might come out to visit me this summer? Yeah, that’s been sort of put on hold, if you know what I mean. We’ve come to the mutual agreement that it’s a little too soon for that sort of thing to happen. Besides, what’s she gonna do when she gets here? I know she loves me and all, but I’m a boring person real life! I need time to prepare, and resources to prepare with! Well, that’s all for now. The time is 6:04 on May 15th, 2009.
I Love Tortoises.
I did a stupid thing today. The time is 8:48P.M. on May 21st, 2009. Today I was given a ring by a friend who thought it was mine. Needless to say, it wasn’t, but I kinda liked it, so I kept it. When I got home, my brother said it might fit on my ring finger, I put on my right hand. I had to use soap. Needless to say, by the time I realized that I had to get it off, my finger had swollen so bad, no amount of butter nor soap could get it off. After about an hour of trying to use pliers and various applications of hot and cold water, my mom suggested I go over to a friend of mine’s and see what they could do. After another attempt with butter, we decided to use wire cutters, which we don’t have at my house. This worked. Hallelujah! My finger still hurts a little, but it’s okay. Oh, here’s a bit of good news, I finished the second chapter of my novel. So far it’s about 21 pages long! The whole book mind you, chapters 1, 2, and a little bit of 3. I’m thinking about putting part of it online to get some reviews and critiques and whatnot. That’s… all I got. The time is 9:05P.M. on May 21st, 2009.
Two Down, A Hopefully Large Number To Go!
Hello peoples! The time is 1:27P.M. on May 31st, 2009. Yesterday, which was a Saturday mind you, I was at the library. I made a Role Play on the website Gaiaonline. Now, my last three ROle Plays didn’t get anywhere, mostly because nobody joined. However this one is drawing people like moths to the flame! Maybe it’s because my other RPs were completely original, but for this one, I’ve got Walt Disney to fall back on! I can’t miss! I used the movie Atlantis: The Lost Empire as a basis, and with a few tweaks, I’ve made a successful RP. I’m so excited! The time is 1:31P.M. on May 31st, 2009.
I Can’t Wait ‘Till Monday!
No internet yet. The time is 2:15P.M. on June 4th, 2009. No, I don't have internet, I just wanted to get this in here. The time is 2:16P.M. on June 4th, 2009.
Sorry If You Thought Otherwise.
 Wind Spirit22 · Thu Jun 04, 2009 @ 08:17pm · 3 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
