Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

I think when you can ignore all the bullshit in the world, you can finally hear yourself think.

A couple of college kids are having a beer pong party next door. It's obnoxious and stupid; since when you do need alcohol to have fun? Maybe I'm just bitter because I wasn't invited.

It has been two months and 14 days since I lost that special someone, and I still find that I am crying myself to sleep. I always thought that for the longest time, I have lived my life without regret, and that I would be truly satisfied with life if I just got a taste of what college is like. After I met him, my priorities changed. He was my life, my joy, my sorrow, my friend. He came before everything. And for the first time, I was the happiest I've ever been. The feeling that true love provides us is one of warmth and appreciation, and I think that everyone should be touched by it. It is a great experience, no matter how short lived it may be.

I actually just heard a girl running out of my neighbor's beer pong infested house crying, telling her friend that she couldn't believe some guy dumped her, and I felt sorry for her. Sorry that most of our relationships are so fleeting and insincere, and that over half of them are based on infatuation rather than real love.

I'm trying not to pick up the phone and call the cops on these stupid drunk kids, because I know that would be cruel. I mean is it okay that they're poisoning themselves for the sake of fun? But at the same time, maybe I should just mind my own business and ignore the fact that they are causing a ******** commotion outside while the entire neighborhood is trying to sleep at 2am.

My emotions are a mess...due to a combination of grief, frustration, lack of sleep, and forgetting to shower.