I m one ******** cranky person...god do I ever hate that about me. Infact i hate alot of things about me.
I hate how I am with people, i hate how I treat people, I just infact hate me...hmmm wat a conincedense hey? Oh well...I guess that I will just have to completly change who I am and never speak my mind ever again because whenever I do, people always seem to get mad at me or get hurt from what I say...
Maybe that's saying something about me, I am a generally negative person I know, but I never realised just how much I might actually be hurting people by what I say...
Why am I the way that I am...uggh...I really wish that I would just stop being me. Be some one that everyone can like maybe? Some one that doesn't have people talking inbehind my back about....some one that isn't me.
Tat would be wonderful if I just wasn't me anymore. Maybe then I could actually like me for me and not alays have to be such a b***h and have every one hate me.
Wow this makes me sounds really conceited, that all Ican think about is what people think about me...I thinkabout myself too much...I should stop that too...
why don't i just go away for a long time...go away form everyone...let them be happy without me being around...I guess no one understand that I am trying not to be what everyone hates about me...I'm trying to stop, but it's harder then itlooks...I may try, but Ican't change everyone else around me to my likings...but that's how i've been brought up...in a way...to change people so that you don't have to change yourself...but then again maybe that's just the way that I think things are so tha I don't have to face the true facts about the way things are...
Ugh maybe I should stop this it's making me madder and madder...writing after bitching and practically fighting usually makes me feel better but this is not helping...ut then again maybe it is....
View User's Journal
Meow
 |
