Silence- If it's not awkward, it's just not worth having.
Life- It's like four square, some how, some way, you will in fact always be back to square one.
Sharing- You took the bigger half you son of a b***h.
2012- Indiana Jones would have sucked without the supernatural relevance.
2012 (movie)- My mom told me that movies aren't real.
Work- Musicals wrote a check they just couldn't cash on this one.
Cybering- you're doing it wrong, that doesn't go there.
Pencils- Glorified pens.
Pens- Glorified pencils.
Mechanical pencils- Flashy pencils for todays metrosexual on the go.
Existence- Don't question it.
Michael Jackson- His death was overtaken in the news by swine flu.
Swine flu- I work in a grocery store, and pork/bacon products have gone down in price because people are in fact that dumb.
The number 12- it's overated.
Cartoons- Tom has only bested Jerry on a few occasions.
The Matrix- A guy took a red pill and is now tripping balls thinking he is fighting robots on a hovership armed with EMP's
The Afro- Proof that humans can defy gravity.
The mullet- Proof that not all ideas are good.
Gray- Make up your goddamn mind already.
Mnemonic devices- they give OPEC it's power
George Bush- Is it too late for a recount?
Tissues- You killed a tree and then blue your nose on it.
Tree Bark- The part of the tree you're not supposed to eat, despite what some granola bars think.
Grass-Whether or not it is greener on the other side depends on what side you are on.
Salad It got grouped with breadsticks because they weren't selling enough...breadsticks.
Hamburgers-at least with steak you have some idea as to which part you are eating.
Edward scissor hands- He probably only started with one scissor hand and lopped off the other by accident.
Sperm Whales- I don't want to know where they got there name.
Pluto- It got pwned.
Live Action Role Playing- There is always that one guy who god modes... until you backhand him with you power gauntlet.
Board Games- I am under the assumption that they spelt bored wrong.
Cheat Codes- Lifes way of saying "it's o.k. that you suck."
Grand theft Auto- NEVER! live action roleplay this, you'll end up with a dead hooker in you backseat and that's no way to start a relationship.
Sidekicks- where the idea of the wingman originated from.
Pong- when are they going to release the prequel: "Ping"
Call of duty- It's also a type of fish.
Fallout 3- Video games are getting smarter...they are making...predictions.
Predictions- The best way to profit off the educated guess.
Educated guesses- most people who make them, are not educated.
Iphone- anything can be original with the right letter in front of it.
Oscar the Grouch- I would give him the money, I trust him not to blow it at the track, he's gonna go get wasted like any other sensible bum.
Bert & Ernie-There in my closet right now.
The sky- it's blue because it's sad
The grass- It's green because it's sick
Winter- Natures way of saying "leave me the ******** alone for a while"
Divorce parties- so we celebrate failure now.
Dog sweaters- Animal cruelty.
The sun- DON'T TOUCH IT!!!!
The moon- The suns less cool younger brother
Stars- I don't think they hit the ground hard enough when they fell from the sky and started auditioning for t.v. shows.
Chuck Norris- I didn't see you in Rocky.
The pyramids- I think those pharos are just compensating for something.
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Observations that I make...at random
Dusk Enforcer
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