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~sigh~ i was at a crossroads....and i basicly doomed one way for another v_v, i now have 3 terrible things on my mind now, and honestly i cant take this anymore. 1 of love, 2 of deaths of my family, and 3 just the fact that i dont enjoy the winter and chrismas like most people do, its just a horrible, terrible time for me to stay and let the tears go where none can watch.