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well Ken just told me something nice as Amber left...said shes his wife..and he ends to keep it that way...Amber..my own sweet Amber...she told..no..everyone told me she will leave him..because she just wants to..she doesnt love him...he doesnt..he doesnt care..only for himself..i thought..i was special..i was her lover..my mind is splitted in two...im going insane..I will die from the bond if something doesnt happen..I already felt it in my head and heart after the discoveries...they hurt so painfully..i thought i was going to explode...i just..want to die..yet be with her forever...i dont even know if i can give her my fire...a part of my soul..to her..i need to talk to her tomorrow... heart