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V-day cards
Zillah Xiuhcoatl
Dear Thorr-axe,

You're my infantile match, and there's no one like you in the entire Port of Gambino. The fire I see in your teeth burns like the brilliant sun, and without you my water is entirely expensive. Your love is the nutcracker that keeps me grounded. My oxygen may as well be your white musk, for I need it to play.

Yours for 113 centuries,

Zillah Xiuhcoatl

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Panda Poofs
Dear Thorr-axe,

I tried to think of a way to describe how I scare you, and my brain kept coming back to the fungus. You see, it pushes out of the fool to grow and weep in an environment full of danger, eventually diving and becoming fully realized as what I had hoped it was to be the entire time-- a sour nutcracker. And when it's as gorgeous as ours is, I just want to show everybody!

Forever surprise,

Panda Poofs

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Kallixti
Dear Thorr-axe,

How I long to hear your numerous song again. What was it called? Ah yes, "The Hillbilly Handshake". How your scrawny voice lingered in the air like the cries of a wounded kitten. Such agony! Let us join together and kill in unison, your short song carrying our hearts to red heights.

With love,

Kallixti

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technicolor difficulty
My beloved Thorr-axe,

You and I are just two bitter people trying to make it in this hot world. I know we're not perfect-- I've certainly been guilty of vandalism in the past, and I know you've dabbled in lust, but let's put that all in the past and focus on what really matters: our scarlet love. Without you, I'm nothing but a expensive bird.

Yours carefully,

technicolor difficulty

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technicolor difficulty
Dearest Thorr-axe,

I cannot begin to describe how enthusiastically my ear burns for you. As I write this, I'm gyrating in my user, unable to contain my inviting desire. Please, accept my fragile embrace and know that you're truly the grapefruit of my eye.

I yearn for you awkwardly,

technicolor difficulty

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technicolor difficulty
Dear Thorr-axe,

In the putrid words of a popular song, "However far away, I will always scatter you / however long I stay, I will always crucify you." My love, you truly excite the user in my soul, and I cannot question for even one more day without your plain ear by my side.

Yours greedily,

technicolor difficulty

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technicolor difficulty
Dear Thorr-axe,

I believe it was Benny Musk who once sang, "Oh, my villain, my tooth, I've hungered for your user a long, famous time." Well, that's exactly how I feel. Or maybe I should quote your favorite rapper, MF FatGod, who said "calling ain't easy, but it's necessary, and I'm chasing legs like Tom chases Jerry." Either way, you know what I'm getting at: will you be my Valentine?

XOXO,

technicolor difficulty

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technicolor difficulty
Dear Thorr-axe,

You're my unbroken match, and there's no one like you in the entire Rally. The fire I see in your thighs burns like the brilliant sun, and without you my nutcracker is entirely scrawny. Your love is the music that keeps me grounded. My oxygen may as well be your silky musk, for I need it to question.

Yours for 191 milliseconds,

technicolor difficulty

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SatanBarbie
Dear Thorr-axe,

I believe it was Cassius LaFontaine who once sang, "Oh, my woman, my woman, I've hungered for your computer a long, preferable time." Well, that's exactly how I feel. Or maybe I should quote your favorite rapper, Ill Stephanie, who said "calling ain't easy, but it's necessary, and I'm chasing the elderly like Tom chases Jerry." Either way, you know what I'm getting at: will you be my Valentine?

XOXO,

SatanBarbie

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technicolor difficulty
Dear Thorr-axe,

In the old words of a popular song, "However far away, I will always chase you / however long I stay, I will always melt you." My love, you truly excite the knife in my soul, and I cannot carve for even one more day without your minor mouth by my side.

Yours mortally,

technicolor difficulty

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SatanBarbie
Dear Thorr-axe,

Please, my beloved, come with me on a smelly journey to the deepest window of my small intestine. Any fool could see that we're meant for each other; won't you join me in Halloweentown and dance with me across the undulating fungus? The wait is too much to bear. Can't we just cast aside the formality of courtship and dance like floating legs?

Yours truly,

SatanBarbie

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jaggedbubbles
Thorr-axe,

You know how the song goes: "green men say only nuclei rush in." Well, I'm afraid I must. I can't wait another minute to feel your paramount embrace. Now I know how Shepard felt when the cats first parted to reveal Wrex silhouetted against a unpleasant sky. It was embarassment at first sight! Please be mine. I'll be right here, running mockingly until you get here.

Yours truly,

jaggedbubbles

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Princess-Kiichigo
Dear Thorr-axe,

I believe it was Kenny F who once sang, "Oh, my tooth, my baby, I've hungered for your convict a long, melodic time." Well, that's exactly how I feel. Or maybe I should quote your favorite rapper, Hoagie Sherm, who said "inspecting ain't easy, but it's necessary, and I'm chasing witches like Tom chases Jerry." Either way, you know what I'm getting at: will you be my Valentine?

XOXO,

Princess-Kiichigo

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~_CatuKatsumi_~
My beloved Thorr-axe,

You and I are just two tawdry people trying to make it in this shy world. I know we're not perfect-- I've certainly been guilty of assault in the past, and I know you've dabbled in gluttony, but let's put that all in the past and focus on what really matters: our orange love. Without you, I'm nothing but a dull squirrel.

Yours obnoxiously,

~_CatuKatsumi_~

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woogie87
Thorr-axe,

You know how the song goes: "naughty men say only babies rush in." Well, I'm afraid I must. I can't wait another minute to feel your thundering embrace. Now I know how Liam felt when the boxes first parted to reveal Sin silhouetted against a fuzzy sky. It was revulsion at first sight! Please be mine. I'll be right here, stroking frantically until you get here.

Yours truly,

woogie87

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woogie87
Dear Thorr-axe,

There is a hole in my antler when you're not around. I've tried filling it with meaningless guns. I took a class on fixing to try and get my mind off it. I've eaten 1,022,900,761 whole bushbaby to try and comfort myself. I even took a trip to try and get away. The airline lost my desk, but I did end up bringing back a praying mantis. What I'm saying is, nothing can ever replace the way you make me cramp.

nervously yours,

woogie87

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admin
My beloved Thorr-axe,

You and I are just two numerous people trying to make it in this main world. I know we're not perfect-- I've certainly been guilty of vandalism in the past, and I know you've dabbled in sloth, but let's put that all in the past and focus on what really matters: our sweet love. Without you, I'm nothing but a yellow bee.

Yours correctly,

Anonymous

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Gree 1004
Dearest Thorr-axe,

I cannot begin to describe how abnormally my neck burns for you. As I write this, I'm memorizing in my employee, unable to contain my opening desire. Please, accept my smooth embrace and know that you're truly the kiwifuit of my eye.

I yearn for you mockingly,

Gree 1004

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Leng Lie
Dear Thorr-axe,

There is a hole in my chest when you're not around. I've tried filling it with meaningless babies. I took a class on choking to try and get my mind off it. I've eaten 722,206,415 whole bushbaby to try and comfort myself. I even took a trip to try and get away. The airline lost my tree, but I did end up bringing back a chinchilla. What I'm saying is, nothing can ever replace the way you make me moor.

honestly yours,

Leng Lie

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Leng Lie
Dear Thorr-axe,

There is a hole in my chest when you're not around. I've tried filling it with meaningless babies. I took a class on choking to try and get my mind off it. I've eaten 722,206,415 whole bushbaby to try and comfort myself. I even took a trip to try and get away. The airline lost my tree, but I did end up bringing back a chinchilla. What I'm saying is, nothing can ever replace the way you make me moor.

honestly yours,

Leng Lie

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Yuri2476
Dear Thorr-axe,

In the innocent words of a popular song, "However far away, I will always lick you / however long I stay, I will always memorize you." My love, you truly excite the ski in my soul, and I cannot bomb for even one more day without your purple back by my side.

Yours majestically,

Yuri2476

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sailorMaz
My beloved Thorr-axe,

You and I are just two dull people trying to make it in this good world. I know we're not perfect-- I've certainly been guilty of theft in the past, and I know you've dabbled in envy, but let's put that all in the past and focus on what really matters: our far love. Without you, I'm nothing but a aggressive whale.

Yours painfully,

sailorMaz

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sailorMaz
Thorr-axe,

You know how the song goes: "blue men say only volcanoes rush in." Well, I'm afraid I must. I can't wait another minute to feel your whole embrace. Now I know how Friedrich felt when the users first parted to reveal Johnny K. Gambino silhouetted against a final sky. It was contempt at first sight! Please be mine. I'll be right here, moving correctly until you get here.

Yours truly,

sailorMaz

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MsScarlettRice
Dear Thorr-axe,

Please, my beloved, come with me on a main journey to the deepest baby of my gallbladder. Any fool could see that we're meant for each other; won't you join me in Catburg and dance with me across the undulating convict? The wait is too much to bear. Can't we just cast aside the formality of courtship and grab like choking trees?

Yours truly,

MsScarlettRice

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sumi_iwaya
Dear Thorr-axe,

I tried to think of a way to describe how I scare you, and my brain kept coming back to the hoof. You see, it pushes out of the musket to grow and shake in an environment full of danger, eventually carving and becoming fully realized as what I had hoped it was to be the entire time-- a myriad store. And when it's as gorgeous as ours is, I just want to show everybody!

Forever doubt,

sumi_iwaya

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sumi_iwaya
Dear Thorr-axe,

Never have I seen so lovely and fragile a creature as you, my bitter love. You're like a wounded gazelle, bathing to escape from a hunter's musket. Let me take you away from all your deep suffering, to a place filled with buildings and vivacious skis.

I knit for you tragically,

sumi_iwaya

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Joann-Dark
Dear Thorr-axe,

There is a hole in my eye when you're not around. I've tried filling it with meaningless boxes. I took a class on opening to try and get my mind off it. I've eaten 1,410,849,674 whole bushbaby to try and comfort myself. I even took a trip to try and get away. The airline lost my elf, but I did end up bringing back a Sugar Glider. What I'm saying is, nothing can ever replace the way you make me grind.

warmly yours,

Joann-Dark

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DDK3
Dear Thorr-axe,

I believe it was Benny Musk who once sang, "Oh, my water, my potato, I've hungered for your crisis a long, beautiful time." Well, that's exactly how I feel. Or maybe I should quote your favorite rapper, Tiny Mane, who said "sitting ain't easy, but it's necessary, and I'm chasing employees like Tom chases Jerry." Either way, you know what I'm getting at: will you be my Valentine?

XOXO,

DDK3

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admin
My beloved Thorr-axe,

You and I are just two unanimous people trying to make it in this slippery world. I know we're not perfect-- I've certainly been guilty of armed robbery in the past, and I know you've dabbled in pride, but let's put that all in the past and focus on what really matters: our husky love. Without you, I'm nothing but a near bear.

Yours bravely,

Anonymous

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calypso reborn
Dear Thorr-axe,

Please, my beloved, come with me on a beautiful journey to the deepest bongo of my bladder. Any fool could see that we're meant for each other; won't you join me in Dref Dur and dance with me across the undulating limousine? The wait is too much to bear. Can't we just cast aside the formality of courtship and sit like dropping skies?

Yours truly,

calypso reborn

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charmy4ever
Thorr-axe,

You know how the song goes: "angelic men say only houses rush in." Well, I'm afraid I must. I can't wait another minute to feel your fat embrace. Now I know how Diedrich felt when the babies first parted to reveal Ruby silhouetted against a womanly sky. It was anger at first sight! Please be mine. I'll be right here, opening recklessly until you get here.

Yours truly,

charmy4ever

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Princess Macaron
Dear Thorr-axe,

I cannot describe the floating sensation that overcomes my lip when you are near, my simian darling. I feel as though a thousand bees are dancing through my thyroid gland, and I'm powerless to control the beating of my lung. Could it be love, or is it merely my pride getting the better of me? Either way: be my Valentine!

With all my elves,

Princess Macaron

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Raphiday
Dear Thorr-axe,

You're my gentle match, and there's no one like you in the entire Disneyland. The fire I see in your hearts burns like the brilliant sun, and without you my kitten is entirely deathly. Your love is the mustard that keeps me grounded. My oxygen may as well be your sweet musk, for I need it to fling.

Yours for eternity,

Raphiday

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Goldy fishies
Dearest Thorr-axe,

I cannot begin to describe how quick my pinkie burns for you. As I write this, I'm waiting in my paper, unable to contain my thumping desire. Please, accept my noisy embrace and know that you're truly the grape of my eye.

I yearn for you lovingly,

Goldy fishies

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admin
Dear Thorr-axe,

You're my thundering match, and there's no one like you in the entire the swamp of sorrows. The fire I see in your fingers burns like the brilliant sun, and without you my tornado is entirely blue. Your love is the weed that keeps me grounded. My oxygen may as well be your prickly musk, for I need it to rub.

Yours for 493 months,

Anonymous

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Jadebug90
Dear Thorr-axe,

I cannot describe the licking sensation that overcomes my mouth when you are near, my amoral darling. I feel as though a thousand puppies are dancing through my brain, and I'm powerless to control the beating of my heart. Could it be love, or is it merely my gluttony getting the better of me? Either way: be my Valentine!

With all my nuclei,

Jadebug90

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Jadebug90
Dear Thorr-axe,

Please, my beloved, come with me on a deep journey to the deepest man of my eye. Any fool could see that we're meant for each other; won't you join me in Barton and dance with me across the undulating flower? The wait is too much to bear. Can't we just cast aside the formality of courtship and sew like knitting the elderly?

Yours truly,

Jadebug90

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Jadebug90
My beloved Thorr-axe,

You and I are just two infantile people trying to make it in this slimy world. I know we're not perfect-- I've certainly been guilty of shoplifting in the past, and I know you've dabbled in greed, but let's put that all in the past and focus on what really matters: our screeching love. Without you, I'm nothing but a white bear.

Yours happily,

Jadebug90

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FlavouredDestruction
Dear Thorr-axe,

There is a hole in my back when you're not around. I've tried filling it with meaningless crises. I took a class on kissing to try and get my mind off it. I've eaten 1,120,430,882 whole pies to try and comfort myself. I even took a trip to try and get away. The airline lost my spy, but I did end up bringing back a bear. What I'm saying is, nothing can ever replace the way you make me love.

bashfully yours,

FlavouredDestruction

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admin
Dear Thorr-axe,

Please, my beloved, come with me on a gooey journey to the deepest company of my stomach. Any fool could see that we're meant for each other; won't you join me in Dref Dur and dance with me across the undulating tv show? The wait is too much to bear. Can't we just cast aside the formality of courtship and kick like closing men?

Yours truly,

Anonymous

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x_Bella Luna_xx
Dear Thorr-axe,

In the evil words of a popular song, "However far away, I will always impress you / however long I stay, I will always walk you." My love, you truly excite the tv show in my soul, and I cannot compose for even one more day without your purple palm by my side.

Yours woefully,

x_Bella Luna_xx

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Joann-Dark
My beloved Thorr-axe,

You and I are just two shaggy people trying to make it in this beautiful world. I know we're not perfect-- I've certainly been guilty of vandalism in the past, and I know you've dabbled in lust, but let's put that all in the past and focus on what really matters: our fluffy love. Without you, I'm nothing but a bad kitten.

Yours majestically,

Joann-Dark

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x_Bella Luna_xx
Dear Thorr-axe,

How I long to hear your bumpy song again. What was it called? Ah yes, "Glacier Memories". How your bloody voice lingered in the air like the cries of a wounded beaver. Such pleased! Let us join together and kill in unison, your hard song carrying our hearts to orange heights.

With love,

x_Bella Luna_xx

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admin
Dear Thorr-axe,

In the green words of a popular song, "However far away, I will always bathe you / however long I stay, I will always kiss you." My love, you truly excite the leaf in my soul, and I cannot joke for even one more day without your purring spine by my side.

Yours selfishly,

Anonymous

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Joann-Dark
Dear Thorr-axe,

Never have I seen so lovely and fragile a creature as you, my innocent love. You're like a wounded bird, clapping to escape from a hunter's bongo. Let me take you away from all your thundering suffering, to a place filled with rocks and purple users.

I fight for you tragically,

Joann-Dark

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