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Diagnosis Follow-Up
Today I had some lab tests done to test my chemicals. If any physical illness is causing any of these symptoms then I'll know soon enough. I'm going to be put on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills, but I hope I don't need a high dose. I know that there's no real "happy pill" that can take every bad thought away. I just want enough to help me function better- to get my mind to stop going blank and freezing up any time I try to force myself to do something to get my thoughts away from depression.

The goal would be to get myself into a position where I no longer need any medication, but I still feel extremely embarrassed that I need this treatment. I don't want to be depressed and anxious all the time and I've constantly fought against it until now- only breaking down when I run out of mental energy to keep fighting and hide away somewhere instead. But my point is that I didn't just allow myself to spiral into depression. I fought tooth-and-nail the whole time. I didn't even want to allow myself to believe I have depression at all until it became this big of a problem. I STILL don't want to believe it but I HAVE to do something about it. I'll use whatever treatment is necessary but I'll also use the power of prayer. With God, all things are possible!


On the bright side, I've never before had a doctor tell me that I need to play more video games.


Proverbs 20:5
"Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water; but a man of understanding will draw it out."

ScribeEzra
Community Member
ScribeEzra
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