I miss him so much.
I'm scared, because my brain is trying to save me from myself.
When I feel emotions, they are so huge that I can get physically sick from them. This is a normal occourance for me. I always feel HUGE emotions.
So when I am sad, my body and mind try to aleviate that by killing the emotion altogether. It's a bad thing, but it does it by itself. Defense mechanism?
My mind wants me to stop loving him, because then I won't miss him.
But I refuse.
I love him too much, and I am ok with the pain it brings. I don't hurt with him as I did with my ex- with my ex, I always hurt, even if he was there. But with my malefriend, he can fix everything just by looking my way.
I miss his eyes, his touch, his witty mouth, his rough hands, his smile, his voice, and every word he utters.
He is my love, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
So shut up, mind! I want my heart to lead for once- something I am rarely wont to do.
...yaaayy.
I am so much not the emo kid.
So don't start thinkin' it (comma) yo.
<3
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In ten seconds, there is a 95% probability that my strength will give out. Trust in me and that 5%.
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