*sighs heavily* well as two of you that might read this already know, my mom is a recovering alcoholic, well she was one anyway. I found a empty botil of brandy in her room yesterday when I was looking for some medicine to give one of our sick dogs..... I know for a fact that, one my step daddy dose not drink, and two he would NEVER bring alcohol into the house because of mom. So I know it had to be hers and she had to of drank it all....... *sighs agene* She had been doing so well to....... Though I must confess that I have had my suspensions sine my sister started to really go down hill, because she would come out of her room and be acting like she was ether on musoil relaxesers or drunk (it’s hard to tell which is which when she is taking Soma) but it kind of kept up and I new she couldn’t still have them so I guess I kind of new before I found the botil. I just didn’t want to admit it to myself....... I just don't understand why she keeps falling of the wagon like this.... Every time stuff gets really hard she goes back to drinking..... I would never go back to using, no mater what! I would rather die then go back to being the same junky I use to be!!! I have been clean for 6 years now! It was 6 on my B-day! Yes I got clean on my b-day, and it was the best gift I ever gave myself!!! Why can't my mom have the same desire to keep her sobriety going? How come every time s**t gets bad she falls of the damn wagon agene and agene? It dose not make sins, it just dose not seem right or logical that I can take my sobriety SO seriously and she is more then willing to through it away time after time and we are mother and daughter....... How dose that make sins??????? ................. Well I guess ether way, on top of EVERYTHING else I have to deal with stress whys, I now have to deal with this......... Well lets just recap on how lovely my life is at the moment shall we? I have a big sister who is a schizophrenic, and has bipolar disorder. Who is ether trying to kill herself or ordering me around, insulting me, or trying to trough me a gilt trip for not spending every waking moment entertaining her! My mother has fallen off the wagon, AGINE! I am not sure if I will have the $ to pay for my books this coming semester so I am forced to take out a loan, and if I won’t be able to get it in time I won’t be able to go to school for a semester. My best friend of 4 years just told me to ******** off for no apparent reason, she has refused to tell me why. My parents financhol status is ssoo rocky right now that we don't have any food in the house, AGINE. Damn near half the electrical appliances in the house are dead or dieing, including the fridge, so I guess its a good thing that its empty! And to top it all off my parents have a bright idea to try and rent this new place from a friend that will cost EVEN MORE $ then this one!!!! Like we can ******** afford it!!!!!!! So yaeh, I'm a little on edge. But of cores no one in my family can know or else I will get my head bit off! If you have made it this fare, thank you for enduring what I had to say, I really needed to get all this off my chest.
whyiseveryoneuwsingmyname Community Member 
|
|
