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When I'm around him, it feels all warm inside. I feel like it's so hard to reply to every one of his words, and if I say something, a couple seconds later, something inside me tells me that was a stupid reply. I feel nervous, and sometimes I think I blush. I want to see him every chance I get. I like smiling at him. I like him smiling at me. I smile when I think of his smile. He makes me happy. I feel like I want to turn back time to the first day we met in PE, when I acted a bit mean to him (like I always do to guys, you know this), when I turn back time, I want to do something else then act mean to him, because that was a bad start. And I regret joing Chorus and Computer because he goes to Band, and happens to play flute, and happens to be good, and happens to be in second year band, which I would be if I haven't joined Chorus. I hate French class, because at PE, I get to see him, and you know that PE is my worst subject. And the first day I met him, there was this girl (shorter than me) besides him, I think they know eachother pretty well. I see him with her today, so now I think they are boyfriend/girlfriend, and I don't want to do anything bad. I also blame myself, because I told myself not to fall with another guy again. Because every guy I fall for doesn't like me back, and I happen to always fall hard. Every guy I've dated, I've never liked so much. I can get a date with the cutest guys(other's "cute" wink , but not with the one I like (my kind of "cute" wink . It feels weird. Whenever I think of him, and during this time that I'm typing this, I feel as if my heart is empty and opened. I really want him to think something else of me than the girl-who-kicks-hard, even though I do. I guess I act so mean towards guys is that I don't want to fall in love, well, not until I'm graduated from college. But I can't help it, and when I do like someone, I don't know how to control my blushing, how to talk to him, how to look at him without feeling this lovey-dovey stuff, and control almost anything to everything I do. But my heart always break in the end, and it takes a long time to get over it. Especially with crushes, they are the hardest to get over, he's my first 100% sure crush. So am I in love or what?
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Community Member
AND BY THE WAY, the more you get to know him, the less wound-up you get when you start talking to him 3nodding 3nodding 3nodding
dear god, im only in 8th @_@;;