I've decided that I don't like the circus. From now on, July 22 will be the "I don't like the circus" day During "I don't like the circus" day, we all get to raid the streets using heavy, blunt objects as weapons. At 8 PM on "I don't like the circus" day, everyone who still remains alive gets to pillage corpses and fill jack-o-lantern shaped bags full of their valuables. And of course, on the morning of "I don't like the circus" day, a ritual manhunt will be held for Pauly Shore. But we're not allowed to kill him. Or else that'd be the end of 'that' tradition. We can just beat him up a little. Maybe gauge out an eye. The person or group who is first to find Mr. Shore will receive a Target gift certificate, so they can stock up on worthwhile items like garden furniture or kitchenware. Participants in "I don't like the circus" day festivities should also probably make sure they have plane, boat, or magical leprechaun rainbow tickets before getting involved with their communities for this lovely holiday. And now I have to go get that a** monkey who's in office to officially declare it "I don't like the circus" day. Happy holidays.
Ablutophobia Community Member 
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