I have all these thoughts swirling around in my head, screaming louder and louder, but there are to many, I want to get some of them down, I want to write, but I can't focus, I can't focus on one thing alone, I think about my pioson, how I need more of it, increase the addiction, just to cure what it left behind the last time, I think about debates and discussions I've had recently, I think about life in general, I think about poems, and I have stories, I have songs of love, life, death, and everything inbetween, about how they can be pointless, and worth everything at the same time, about controdictions, how everything is a controdiction in its self, I have just about everything else in here too, all talking to me at once, all begging to come out, all pleading with me, pulling at me, ripping me out of myself, then pushing me into myself, finding the need to move, to get out fidgets, to pace and think, then crippling me, my body contorting to deal with the pain it leaves behind, twisting and turning me in every shape, every direction. my mind is like a tide, the thoughts comes in, drowning me, taking me under, suffocating me, then they leave me, dry and dehydrated, gasping for life giving breath, yet shying away from the pain life its self can bring, flopping helplessly without the water, but to afraid to move back to it, it'll come back on it's own, with the cycle of the moon....I'm currently drowning, it's pulling me further then ever before, and I don't know if I'll be able to make it back to shore, my arms and legs are weighted, the wet clothes on my body pulling on them, gravity working it's magic, pulling me to the depths while the waves push me under, I can't swim, I can't scream, I can't open my mouth, yet I can feel it opening, the fire in my lungs burning, hotter, harder, brighter, I can feel my mouth agape, as I rasp for air, but instead, I fill myself with more water, where I look for relief from my thoughts, I find more, when I try to write, they come back, louder,and more plentiful....and they slowly destroy me.....
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Krazy Kiwis Krazy Life
A place for me to journal about all the krazy things that happen in my life, and get out all the krazy ideas i have in my head, if you're looking for a frequently updated journal though, look elsewhere.
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