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Ideas for dealing with finding out I was lied to about my real dad my whole freakin life till this year...

1. Crying, as appealing as this option is, I don't have time for it, nor do I like explaining to nosey a** people why I'm sobbing like a baby.

2. Screaming, like the previous option an explanation would be almost necessary, and I have no time for explaining.

3. Writing, I think this is my most used option, though I'd really like to send what I write to the assholes that called themselves parents, and that's not even an option. I may still resort to this if I find no other more pleasing option.

4. Self abuse, shya. Reason one I won't resort to this, it's stupid. Reason two, I'm not looking for pity, and attention whores use this method. I have no use for anyones attention, if anything I wish I had less attention, with the exception of maybe one person. Reason three, I'm a wimp. 3nodding

5. Drawing, this option sounds good, but when it comes down to drawing violent images the way I want to, I'd feel like I need to keep them hidden so that no one would question my sanity.

6. Ripping paper or some other destructive form of release, this is an inviting option, but at the same time, destruction begets destruction and I'd opt for productive ideas over this. I may rip up a couple sheets of paper though after I've written every profain name I can think of to call the a**-b*****d who called himself Daddy.

7. Sexual gratification, again an appealing option, but not a road I'd like to take for multiple reasons. For one I'd prefer to develope a healthy relationship with someone who cares for me mutually. Rather than use a person to deal with my troubles.

8. Music, listening to it and singing aloud to it. A great option, but only effective if no one else is around. I don't have that luxury much, but I try to do that when I can anyway. It's good to have music that's uplifting (ie, makes you shake and dance) rather than depressing music. Dwelling only makes it worse.

Obviously I'm writing some of these as an example of what not to do when dealing with a traumatizing situation within your life, in hopes that someone in my situation will have reasons not to resort to them. The healthier options are the productive ones.

More thoughts on this to come...