99 ways you know you live in Pennsylvania You know the Cotton Eyed Joe. Hainta is a word and it roughly translates to haven't you. Hunting loses it's G. Fireworks aren't just for the Fourth of July. Burning tires seems completely alright. Scranton is pronounced Scranen. Everyone waves at you when you pass them on the road. It is perfectly fine to snowmobile through someones lawn at 11:30 at night. Backpacks are called book-bags. A plant is a number. Example: One, two, tree. You call the wrong number and have a full conversation with the person who picks up the phone. Binghamton is pronounced Bamton. All roads that are not in the state are considered smooth and straight. The majority of all road signs have bullet holes in them. Seeing a horse go down the road isn't anything to be worked up about. You have seen multiple horse-drawn carriages in your life-time. Hay-bales look like marshmallows. People say heys yous guys. Guns come in 4 types: Bb, potato, shot, and paint. Marshmallows come in liquid form. Example: Fluff. A pond is considered a pool You don't need a season to hunt something. There are four seasons: Almost winter, winter, not winter, and spring. 32 degrees is considered warm. You can plow your own driveway. You have a Scooby-Doo Mystery Machine by your house. The days are either hot, cold, or the Fourth of July. Wearing jeans and cowboy boots is dressed up. Right under a keep PA beautiful sign there is a washing machine. The news can call for no snow and you get 3feet. There are milk cartons with candles in them on the sides of the roads. You have to drive to every house to Trick-Or-Treat. Your mobile home doesn't move. You live in a mobile home. Some people's septic tanks are non-existent. People sit in trees, in freezing weather, trying to get a deer for fun. Tractors are a man's best friend. Yellow and green go together. You can find turkeys in your backyard. You drive in the middle of the road. You're related to everyone. Your church has a pirogi sale. Rock walls are found everywhere. A Red Schoolhouse is a restaurant. A Turkey Hill is a gas station. You're use to the smell of manure in the morning. Bad weather will turn off your Internet. You can say you have half a cow in your freezer and not get a weird look. Every town seems to have it's own school. Your friend gets chased by evil ducks. Your favorite color is camouflage. You wear your work boots to school. You put on camouflage to make yourself invisible but then put a bright orange vest so people can see you. The main color on your car is primer. A beautiful room incorporates multiple stuffed animal heads. You have antlers on your truck. The most expensive item you own is your gun. Getting out of school because of hunting is a legitimate excuse. Your friends own their own buses. Your school puts the air-conditioning on in the winter and the heat in the summer. You have as many farms as there are Starbucks in CA. You never have a birthday party. You can ice-skate on your pool. You can see 20 deer on the same road. Roadkill equals dinner. You can bye fresh food on the side of the road. People believe global warming is a myth. Everyone calls it PA instead of Pennsylvania. Kitten is pronounced kiten.(See 6) You burn your garbage. Tea-berry ice-cream tastes like Pepto Bismol. There's at least one car on cinder-blocks in your driveway. An engine lift can be used as deer skinning equipment. You head-butt a cow when it won't obey you. When you got a couple of bucks it doesn't mean you have money. Tacos are called wraps. Eggs that are sunny-side up are called dip eggs. It's safer to drive in winter due to all of the pot-holes are filled with snow. You have a manure pond. People say they seen you yesterday. Roadkill is considered a mere speed bump. Your front yard looks like a safari zone in the summer. It snows in July. You rely on a Groundhog to tell you how the weather is going to turn out. The sign trespassers will be shot, survivors will be shot again is taken literally. Storms can be electrical. Turtles are ferocious. There are empty beer bottles in your wall from your previous contractor. It's easier to bulldozer your lawn than mow it. Your nearest neighbor lives 5 miles down the road. There are more beagles than people. You can't get phone reception in the Forest City yet you get full bars in Pleasant Mt. You spend hours trying to catch a fish and then throw it back. You can ice-fish in January. The only Mexican restaurant you could find was Don Pablo's. When at a Mexican restaurant there is a one man mariachi band. You have been driving your whole life. Squirrels will cross half the road then decide it's to dangerous and return the way it came. You can eat your fortune cookie and the fortune within without even noticing it.
Neveryoumind22Woot · Sun Mar 15, 2009 @ 08:03pm · 0 Comments |