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biggrin Lessons from Kindergarden biggrin
I only remember a few things about kindergarten. There were the little mats, my best friends, crayola crayons and... the boys. I dont remember any single person in particular, just the boys. It was my first experience with a "bunch of boys." Mss Kim, our teacher, worked hard at adjusting us to our new surroundings-- She seated us in staggered boy, girl, boy, girl seating charts, and worked at games that partnered the girls with the boys. But at recess the girls still hung out together, as did the boys. Reminds me of Jr. High. Girls on one side of the dance floor, boys on the other.
Were different that way arent we? Not fighting, not at odds, just different.
It was something we learned in kindergarten.
What are little boys made of? Frogs amd snails, and puppy dog tails. Thats what little boys are made of.
What are little girls made of? Sugar and spice and everything nice Thats what little girls are made of.
Boys, girls, men, women are different. It doesnt take a person with a fancy degree to know that. I was just a kid in Mss. Kim's kindergarten class. But I knew there was something different. And somehow, I knew those differences went way beyond the blue and pink signs on the bathroom doors.
Stu. Weber points out of his personal experiences.
I will never forget the January 20, 1992 cover of Time magazine. It may be the strangest cover I have ever seen. The picture on the front is not strange: Two youngsters smile out at you--a boy and a girl. The little boy proudly flexes his biceps while the little girl eyes him admiringly. The bold headline below the picture asks: Why Are Men and Women Different? The subhead below proudly announces: New Studies Show They're Born That Way.
Really?
Wow! Thats news? That is new? O the greatness of modern research. We have finally proven in the halls of science what we already proven in the hallways of kindergarten.
biggrin What a difference a day makes biggrin
Someone I know once wrote a story of a husband and wife going on tour/ vacation of Japan. One day in their tour was particularly stressful. They had to check in with their transportation several times throughout the day, and all on an uncomfortable, tight schedule. It was a big day for both of them. The kind of day a man likes to charge through, accomplish, complete. Unfortunately for him, they found themselves in the area of Tokyos open marketplace. Just the type of shopping a woman likes to savor. Linger over. Enjoy.
Obviously conquering and savoring do not go together really well. As you can fill in the blanks, it was not an easy day for the couple. He was tight. She was tight.
But hey he thought, we got through it! We did it. Checked it off the list. Conquered. It was over
Or so he thought...
Men are compartmentalized. Focused. One thing at a time.
Women are connected. Comprehensive. Especially when it comes to relationships. Everything just goes together. What happened in the morning has everything to do with what happens in the evening.
At this last Church Camp, I watched a intersting schene play out before me at the basketball courts.
Sometime on Wednesday, two games were taking place simultaneously. ((The contrast between the girls and the boys games ill illustrates the point here.)) The boys game was vigorous, competitive--and rough. Bodies would fly, crash to the asphalt, and lie there--some writhing is apparent pain--but the contest went on without a moments interruption. The injured player was forgotten. The games must go on.
The girls, seemingly with less self-esteem vested in winning, appeared to be actually enjoying each other during the game. At on point, there was something of a crash with one young lady slipping momentarily to the pavement. Immediately the girls game halted. All nine remaining players ran to the side of their downed comrade. The little outdoor court was suddenly filled with concern, compassion, and condolences. The games itself was forgotten. The relationship must be cared for.
Now the fact that men are focused on the task should be no surprise. Its part of the protector in them. And the fact that women focus more on relationships, should be no surprise either. Its part of the helpmate of their very nature.
biggrin Something missing in Eden biggrin
So imagine with me now.
God has been busy creating. Stars, Sun, Earth, Moon. Creatures, millions of them in every size, shape and color. In Gods own words, it has been nothing but good. But he is disturbed. There is one not good.
It is not good for the man to be alone (Genesis 2:1 cool .
Now this fact hasnt registered to Adam yet. From his rather limited experience, Adam thought his life was goin along quite wonderfully. This was heaven on earth. The world smelt new, there was plenty to eat. That was all before God started the parade down Main Street. It was a parade of animals. And it was fun too for a while. There they came, two, by two, by two, by two, by two. It was not long before Adam got the picture. He was by himself. Alone. He had no counterpart. All the creatures came in twos, he did not.
The first little tendrils of loneliness stole across his heart. Life had been full, full, full. What was this place in his chest that felt empty?
Ever been alone? I mean really alone. For a long time? I cannot think of anything worse that aloneness. It can be sheer terror. Thats why solitary confinement borders on the cruel and unusual. And why it is so effective in breaking down a P.O.W. The Lord had said it all, It is not good for the man to be alone. And now Adam knew it, too.
So God, with all his wisdom and smartness, finished the sentence with a wonderful promise, I will make a helpmate suitable for him. And He did! The Creator didn't just snap his fingers and come up with something. In the words of Scripture, He fashioned her. He sculpted her. He paid attention to the lines. He worked at it. He created a work of art--mentally, EMOTIONALLY, physically, and spiritually. She was a helpmate suitable.
Fellow ladies, take no offence here. Helpmate is no inferior title. It describes no lesser person. It is not helper as in a mechanic helper.
Helper is a majestic term. A woman is a helper suitable or corresponding to the man. That is another way of saying she is no duplicate. Not the same. Not a clone. A woman is not a man with redesigned mechanics. There is no redundancy here. She is Woman. Beautiful, Creative, and Different.
Adam did not need a fishing partner, or another guy to race deer with. Man needed woman.
But for some reason, our culture doesn't seem to accept these differences.
People all around us are constantly trying to tell us there is no fundamental difference between men and women. Equality is the name of the game.
biggrin But, equality is not sameness. biggrin
In the words of Stu Weber again, "How ironic that a culture that espouses the wonders of diversity shies away from the most obvious and beautiful form. In our unbridled enthusiasm for equality we go to any lengths to minimize the magnificent difference between men and women."
But is doesnt work.
Just how differnet are we?
One gifted person, Dr. Joyce Brothers, says is clearly,
"Are men and women really so different? They are. The really are. Ive spent months talking to biologists, neurologists, genetics, research psychiatrists, and psychologists. What I discovered was the men are more different from women that I hand known. Their bodies are different. The minds are different. Men are different from the very composition of their blood to the way their brains develop, which means they think and experience life differently form women."
God says it quite clearly--male and female He created them Two different words. Two opposite genders.
Dr. Paul Popenoe writes it out more clearly
"Men and Women differ in the very cell of their bodies. This difference in the chromosome combination is the basic cause of the development into maleness and femaleness
Women have greater constitutional vitality, perhaps because of this chromosome difference. Normally, they outlive men by three or four years, in the U.S.
Womens blood contains more water (20 fewer red blood cells). Since these supply oxygen to the body cells, she tires more easily and is more prone to faint. Her constitutional viability is therefore strictly a long-range matter. When the working days in British factories, under wartime conditions, were increased from 10-12 hous, accidents of women increased 150%. Men not at all."
Dr. Richard Restak helps us even more.
"Girls speak sooner, have larger vocabularies, rarely demonstrate speech defects, exceed boys in language abilities, and learn foreign languages more easily. Boys have better total body coordination but are poorer at detailed hand activity (e.g, stringing beads). Of eleven subtests for psychological measurements in the most widely used general intelligence test, only two (digit span and picture arrangement) reveal similar mean scans for males and females. There are six differences so consistent that the standard battery of this intelligence test now contains a masculinity-femininity index to offset gender-related proficiencies and deficiencies."
And finally, Anastasia Toufexis:
"When men try to kill themselves, it is commonly out of an injured sense of pride or competence, often related to work. When women attempt suicide, it is usually because of failures involving lovers, family, or friends."
This statement offers a powerful insight into femininity as the rest of the story. It is the same primary quality that the Creator was getting across when he said, It is not good for man to be alone.
biggrin Okay. now I gotta interrupt this time to say a story that I recently encountered with my dad. ((whom I love, I just gotta laugh with him sometimes)) biggrin
A close friend of the family became a grandparent not too long ago. It was a joyous occasion reallybut there were a few, temporary problems with the birth. Something happened (dont know what) and the baby turned yellow. Immediately the infant was rushed into the baby room (How would I know what its called) and placed under all these colorful wires.
Anyway, my friend, was telling us (our entire family) about this traumatic experience in her live where her grandchild was placed on the baby version of life support. During this time, somehow they snuck a picture of the poor kind when all the wires were connected to him, and we were all passing it around as she was telling her story.
When the story was over, I looked and saw my dad still holding the picture, staring intently, as if he were there in the room with the child when it was taken. Silence filled the room as we all eagerly awaited to hear the deep thoughts spinning in his head. Taking off his glasses and pulling the picture closer, he squinted his eyes as if he were looking at the afternoon sun and focused on a little spot on the photograph. We all remained without a sound, still wondering what unfathomable feelings were running through his busy mind. Suddenly, he gently set the picture down, looked directly into the eyes of my friend, and said in a voice barely audible except to her and I,
I wonder what model number that is? (He was referring to the incubator)
biggrin End Storytime biggrin
biggrin The Nurturer of Life biggrin
A strong indication of a Woman's heart appears in Genesis 3:20. Adam gives her a name that is at once very personal and revealing. Now the man called his wife name Eve, because she was the mother of all the living.
Admittedly, that sounds kinda, funny when I first read it. More like a quote from a novel than the bible. ((maybe thats just me though)) But it adds even more to the rest of the story. Eve's very name highlighted her life-giving role. Before they ever painted the nursery or started a family, Adam saw in her a nurturing quality that this world desperately needs.
Equipped with strong relational skills and acute interpersonal sensitivities, a woman is a developer of life. I noticed this more while watching Kristine Allison's baby grow, and carefully watching the nurturer come out in her. She builds human beings. Yes, her body is equipped to reproduce biologically. But, the visible physical properties are merely a reflection of the invisible spiritual realities. Her nature is to nurture. She communicates very naturally at the soulish level.
biggrin Of Buffaloes and Butterflies. biggrin
Alright. Before I go on any further, I may want to outline what Ive said so far in more of a guy format.
*Men tend to be tough and strong. Women tend to be tender and gentle. *A man tends toward logic and linear thinking. A woman tends toward emotion and verbal communication. *A man looks toward the long haul. A woman is concerned about the here and now. *A man tends to be more skeptical and suspicious (I think its the protector in him). A woman tends to be more believing and trusting. (I think its the nurturer in her).
Author and speaker Gary Smalley really nails down some of these general characteristics in his somewhat whimsical buffalo and butterfly comparison.
"The butterfly has a keen sensitivity. It is sensitive to the slightest breeze. It notices the beauty of even the tiniest of flowers. Because of its sensitivity, it is constantly aware of all the changes going on around it, and is able to react o the slightest variation in its environment. Thus, the butterfly reacts with swiftness toward anything that might harm it. (Try to catch one without a net sometime) If a tiny pebble were taped to its wing, the butterfly would be severely injured and eventually die."
That, my fellow friends, is a powerful portrayal of thee feminine side. Equally graphic is the description of the buffalo.
"The buffalo is another story. It is rough and calloused. It does not react to a breeze. It is not even affected by a thirty mile-an hour wind. It just goes right on doing whatever it was doing. Its not aware of the smallest of flowers, nor does it appear to be sensitive to the light changes in its environment. Tape a pebble to the buffalos back and he probably wont even feel it.
The buffalo is not rotten to the core just because it goes around stepping on pretty flowers. In fact, the buffalos toughness is a tremendous asset. His strength, when harnessed, can pull a plow that four grown men cant pull[the man] may tend to plow though circumstances, while [the woman] may feel life and [her] surroundings with much more sensitivity."
THE END
accountdeleted2001 · Tue Jul 29, 2008 @ 10:30pm · 0 Comments |
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