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i thought i was healed
scars fading into silver lines
on my body and on my raw heart
but i've been proved wrong
again
i am nothing but sorrow and madness
a bundle of broken, rattling bones
there is nothing lovely, nothing beautiful
or sacred in this tomb
there is only ash and mud and filth
i am wordless on the floor
my blood and the mud mix
perfectly one and the same
i have no value
i am worthless
as i am now
how can i be better
with this boulder of expectations
crushing me
s l o w l y