|
|
|
if anyone can interpret any part of this dream for me, it'd be much appreciated. I think it may be pertinent to events currently going on in my life...I'd loe to understand myself in relation to them.
so this dream begins with me being a part of some surrogate family and participating in a game show, like Double Dare just outdoors. I'm not very good at any of the games we're playing, and we're obviously losing, so this surrogate family decides to just quit because of me and take me home. They drive me only half way, but because I offer to walk the rest. They drop me off at the end of this bridge, a very twisty bridge that goes along the edge of the river instead of crossing it (we had already crossed to get to the side I lived on). this bride is kind of like a railroad bridge in that it has tracks, but there are only the tracks, none of the little wooden crossy thingies under it (I wish I could remember what those are called).
I manage to get across this bridge on a little train cart kind of thing, but it moves on its own at really fast speeds. when I get to the end of the bridge, I am still at the edge of the river, but much farther down and closer to my home. I next have to cross train tracks, which is already a fear of mine to begin with. As I begin to cross the first set, I see a bright light speeding towards me, much like a train upon the tracks. It must have been a trick of the mind or something. It was only a small golf-cart kind of vehicle speeding along next to the tracks, with a bright light attached to the front. I cross both sets of train tracks without further incident.
as I keep going, I enter a tunnel. It is a long twisty path, the interior looking like a public bathroom/shower, and is full of people. I continue through it. One scene that sticks out in my mind is a Hindu woman going to get soap from a dispenser, and an employee taking it from her hands.
now comes that I remember best. I come across two people I know, sitting in deep conversation. One is my kinda-sorta recent ex-boyfriend, Johnny. His hair is for soem reason an odd turquoise color (in real life its just brown). Next to him is the boyfriend of a friend I no longer talked to named John. He has his head down and isn't really making eye contact with anyone and is wearing shiny PVC boots, the kind fetish models wear. He doesn't seem to be listening to Johnny but I know he is, and I don't know what they're talking about.
I go over to try and get Johnny's attention (to try and give him a hug, if I remember correctly) and he swats me away, something he's never actually done to me. He falls right back into conversation with John, who hasn't looked up.
I stay there and turn around. Behind us is the entrance to another one of the shower-rooms, and apparently they're co-ed. I see John's girlfriend's mother, and wonder if the friend I no longer talk to, her daughter, is there as well. I then see my Uncle Tim. I try to say hi, I wave, but he doesn't notice me.
Its about here that my recolletion of the dream gets foggy. I don't really remember anything afterward, or if dream-me ever got home or not. But I do remember waking up this morning and the first thing that popped into my head was "Why was Johnny talking to him?"
 Tennyo-Selene · Wed Aug 01, 2007 @ 07:18pm · 2 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
|
I feel like crying.
I keep wanting to call him; there's this psychotic b***h buried deep in me that is sitting there going, "Why hasn't he called yet?" And I keep having to tell her "Because he doesn't care anymore, sweetie, he doesn't care."
And I keep expecting him to call and see how my day was. But I know that's not important to him anymore.
Transition is horrible.
Tennyo-Selene · Tue Jul 31, 2007 @ 04:17am · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
|
I've cried far too much this week. I honestly can't even muster up any tears, I just have this awful aching feeling in my chest. is this what is feels like?
got the "Let's just be friends" line again.
never trust a guy, not even if he says that you're beautiful even when you're not wearing makup.
they never mean it.
Tennyo-Selene · Sun Jul 29, 2007 @ 03:48am · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
|
went to a show last night. some band whose name I can't remember (and rightfully so; they were absolutely horrible), duo from Philly called Dyksick (better than the name implies), In Tenebris from Charlottesville, VA (what I saw of their set was pretty cool, they're on tour opening for Bella Morte at the moment), and of course, Bella Morte.
didn't actually get to see Bella Morte. paid 15$ for my self (and another $15 for Johnny) and half way through In Tenebris' set, my mom calls and pitches a fit. I have to go home.
moral of the story: I hate menopausal bitches.
Tennyo-Selene · Fri Jul 27, 2007 @ 05:52am · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
because I have nothing better to do |
|
|
|
|
|
|
yeah. I JUST POSTED, STFU.
looking through more old entries, they make me giggle. At one point I apparently expressed an urge to hitch-hike across the country. That's changed the backpacking across Europe. Blah, I needz to save ma money for that one, huh. I supposed it'd be CHEAPER to hitch-hike across the country, but I'm sure that the second car I got into would end up being the LAST car I got into...
blah...
Tennyo-Selene · Wed Jul 25, 2007 @ 04:55am · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
|
anyone ever have that feeling of "I wanna take a break from life"? I am in one of those moods right now. So many things, that alone wouldn't make me feel this awful, have come together and hit me like a ton of bricks.
I absolutely hate this feeling.
Tennyo-Selene · Wed Jul 25, 2007 @ 04:51am · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
|
has it been forever.
FOREVER.
Like, 2 1/2 years since I've been on here. How bizarre.
You'd think I'd have things to talk about, but I really don't. Pretty much all the wonderful new friends from the last few posts are gone, I realized how horrible they really were. They've all been efficiently replaced. This is just weird, it really is. Getting to go back and read things from quite some time ago. Lots of that stuff I hardly remember.
Oh well. Hoping to get back into this. Not that anyone is even listening.
Tennyo-Selene · Thu Jul 19, 2007 @ 07:17pm · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Okay, the Nazi Regime of my school now thinks its okay to blame someone for something serious, even if they didn't do it, so they have something to say when they inform a parent.
So, here's what happened. There's this painfully, painfully nerdy girl that goes to my school (Like, she watches kids cartoons and doesn't dress in anything that's not pink, purple, or flowery.) Obviously, she wears glasses. Nasty, hideous glasses, that are like coke bottles, but instead of black plastic, they're like, pink and purple and have little ribbons on the joints.
And today in gym, someone broke them.
I'm not in the gym class that it happened in, so I really don't know the whole story. But no one else does, either.
What's really pissing me off is that they're blaming my friend Lauren because, according to one girl, 'she's the *only* one that could've done it'. And that's only because she forgot to bring her gym clothes and was sitting on the bench the whole time. And they're not even suggesting that it was an accident, either. They're accusing her of doing it maliciously, and on purpose.
First of all, I know her, and she'd never do anything like that. Second, all the stories of what happened are totally conflicting. Another girl says that she SAW my other friend Megan break her glasses (And I really doubt that she'd do it, either. She uses words to hurt people's feelings. wink ), then there's another who says it was either Megan or a girl named Sydnee who did it. (I don't really like Sydnee, and she seems to be a compulsive liar, but she's one of the only people that talks to Nerd Girl.)
But to make a long story short, Lauren is the goat. Now she's gonna get in trouble with her b***h mom, all 'cause of the malicious cunts I go to school with. (And yes, this calls for the use of the 'c' word.)
Tennyo-Selene · Thu Dec 22, 2005 @ 02:04am · 1 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
|
I hate Andy Rooney.
Anyone who's ever seen the news show 60 Minutes knows who I'm talking about. Yeah, that fat, old ******** who, for some reason that's beyond me, gets 5 minutes a week of network TV to complain about s**t that NO ONE else has EVER complained about.
What does he whine about, you wonder? Something that someone actually cares about, like the faults in the US government, or arguements over rights like abortion, gay marriage, and the right to die? Ohhhh, no. Something that might actually effect people, pah! The man doesn't even take the time to trim his own eyebrows!
So...what does he b***h endlessly about? Well, this week, he took the time to address the issue of catalogues. And not even false advertising in them, but the AMOUNT YOU GET around the holidays!!
Allow me to speak for everyone when I say...wtf?
Yeah. Have you ever heard anyone complain about that?
And what are businesses supposed to say to that? Oh, wow, companies trying to sell thier product!! Imagine that!
I think the thing that disgusts me most about this guy is that he actually gets paid to rant about things like THAT. I mean, if he can get paid to talk about the amount of catalogues you get near Christmas for five minutes, I should get paid double to talk about him for 2.5 minutes.
Honestly.
Tennyo-Selene · Mon Dec 19, 2005 @ 01:40am · 4 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
