it has been a while since my last entry. life has taken a hale of a turn I am planning on leaving in a couple of months, I have a stupid brother and now I have learned that the fates have put another brick on my shoulder.
Resonantly (some months) my sister in-law, second oldest brother and their little girl have just moved back home to our house. this is good unfortunately my brother brought along his troubles and some of those trouble have come back to haunt him. putting our family into a bit of a bind. on top of it all I learned that my mother has come down with a case of crazy cells that just don't know when to stop growing (commonly known as cancer) she will be out of work for a time and next week she goes to hopefully get it all fixed. most people feel a great connection to their parents, I am one of them. I love my mother dearly and I pray from the very core of my being that this will all get better. I spent a couple of hours tearing it up and i don't plan on spilling any more (unless there is good news).
one of the few things I hate and can not stand is being yelled at or knowing that someone is angry at/disappointed in me it makes my insides brake and hurt. when this happens I often find myself receding. To stop my self from showing any sign of weakness I shut my mouth and freeze. after the shock I make myself act like every thing is okay by doing something that would make it appear so. (ex. doing chores, reading a book any thing) or I just leave the area.
this is a terrible habit I have gotten into and it is one that I am trying to kill.
this is all thank you for letting me blab <3
Resonantly (some months) my sister in-law, second oldest brother and their little girl have just moved back home to our house. this is good unfortunately my brother brought along his troubles and some of those trouble have come back to haunt him. putting our family into a bit of a bind. on top of it all I learned that my mother has come down with a case of crazy cells that just don't know when to stop growing (commonly known as cancer) she will be out of work for a time and next week she goes to hopefully get it all fixed. most people feel a great connection to their parents, I am one of them. I love my mother dearly and I pray from the very core of my being that this will all get better. I spent a couple of hours tearing it up and i don't plan on spilling any more (unless there is good news).
one of the few things I hate and can not stand is being yelled at or knowing that someone is angry at/disappointed in me it makes my insides brake and hurt. when this happens I often find myself receding. To stop my self from showing any sign of weakness I shut my mouth and freeze. after the shock I make myself act like every thing is okay by doing something that would make it appear so. (ex. doing chores, reading a book any thing) or I just leave the area.
this is a terrible habit I have gotten into and it is one that I am trying to kill.
this is all thank you for letting me blab <3
