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Drinking The Koolaid Pretty much whatever I want to put here.


Diet Poison
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Birth Story
The 25th was 3 days after my due date. The day started off well, though I had an 8 AM doctor's appointment. They did an ultrasound and guessed that the baby was around 7 lb, 15 oz. I didn't believe their measurements, and neither did Yoshi...and the doctor was still willing to let me attempt a natural birth. After the ultrasound, we had a non-stress test. Now, I hate morning appointments, because my little tenant was never really awake in the mornings. Come afternoon, he started wiggling like mad, but mornings were more of a rest period.

Yoshi and I thought the NST went well, even though he wasn't super wiggly and I wasn't having a lot of contractions. My OB, however, disagreed. Besides not wanting him to get much/any bigger, she was concerned and labeled the baby as "non-responsive." Then, she told us that it was best if we induced...right away. Within an hour, we'd grabbed our stuff and headed to the hospital to have our baby.

Once we got into the (large and comfy) labor and delivery room, they hooked me up to the monitors and IV, and started the pitocin slowly. I was already 3cm dilated. The contractions weren't so bad at first, but they intensified as the nurses turned up the pitocin and my doctor arrived and broke my water. My brother arrived after that, for support and to take pictures.

Soon enough, the contractions were pretty bad. I held on as long as I could, but by 5 cm dilated (4 hours into labor), I was shaking in pain and asked for a half-dose of stadol. I'm a little sensitive to medication, and I knew a full dose would be too much. The anesthesiologist agreed to the half-dose and administered it, though I didn't feel much of anything for like another hour. When I did feel it, the stadol hit me like a train. I still felt the contractions, though significantly less so in my back, but I was loopy as hell and just didn't care. At that point, I thought it was going well and I was going to manage to have him soon. Baby had dropped pretty low and I was dilating and thinning out.

I don't remember a lot of what happened next. The nurses kept messing with the external monitors, because the baby kept kicking them out of place. I nodded off now and again, so there's plenty I missed, along with the fact that I wasn't all there anyway. I do remember them saying that the pitocin wasn't giving my uterus a chance to rest, and they turned it down halfway. They came back a while later and turned it back up. At some point, they decided to use an internal monitor--one for the baby, and one for my uterus. The next thing I was aware of, was having an oxygen mask forced onto me. The room was flooded with people--nurses I hadn't seen before. I managed to understand the word "c-section," and tried to ask Yoshi what was going on. He looked upset, and I think he tried to explain it, but I wasn't understanding much of what was happening around me. I didn't see my brother, but I don't think I was aware enough to know that he was/had been there, either.

Someone--I don't know who, told me that they had to get the baby out pretty quickly and I was going to have to have an emergency c-section. I started to freak out and cry, but I couldn't get any tears out...so I just panicked. They rushed the bed to the OR. During the trip, I lost track of Yoshi. I just remember the bed moving very quickly, getting to the OR and being asked a bunch of questions.

The surgical staff lifted me off the bed and to the operating table, strapping my arms down and man-handling my legs into position. I felt a lot of pressure and it was uncomfortable, but no pain. I did feel them wiping the yellow, anti-bacterial stuff all over my belly...and the burning of a shot. After that, I noticed my OB was in the room, already in scrubs and a mask. I only knew that it was her by her voice. She told me that the baby had to be removed as quickly as possible. I tried to ask what was going on and what exactly was wrong, but no one was telling me anything. I muttered "I'm scared" a couple of times, hoping that someone would bother to reassure me, but that's when I started getting extremely sleepy. That's when everything fades off for a while.

I woke up in a strange room, a few beds on either side of me...a row of computers several feet in front of me, and one woman in scrubs walking around the room. I was still sort of messed up from the drugs, but I tried to ask her about my baby. Before the surgery, it was implied that my son was in danger, and I wanted to know if he was alright. She paid very little attention to me, and wouldn't completely answer that--or any question I asked, not that I was sure I was making any sense. I asked for my husband and son. I asked if there was anything wrong with my baby. I asked how I was cut--if there'd be a chance for a VBAC in a couple of years. She just sort of gave me funny looks and didn't say much.

Eventually, they wheeled me out of recovery and to the maternity ward. I think I finally saw Yoshi again then, in the hallway. I asked him about the baby--he said the baby was fine. Since he could seem to understand me, I asked if our son had any birth defects or anything. Yoshi said that he was perfect. After that, my memory sort of cuts off until the drugs wore off. I don't remember meeting my son, or holding him for the first time.

When I got a chance to ask more questions, I wanted to know what exactly had happened. Apparently, my uterus not getting a chance to rest had stressed us both out. The baby's heart rate dropped (70's-80's I think) and mine skyrocketed. They'd been worried about losing him, so the safest route really was an emergency c-section. According to Yoshi, he heard the baby start crying a minute or two after they told him that I had been put under and was stable. I am so glad they let him stay with our son, since I missed the first few hours of his life. At least he had one of his parents.

It took us until the next morning to name him, though thankfully we both were thinking the same thing. One of our name options was absolutely perfect for him--we named our son Damien. He was born at 6lb, 15oz and 19 inches long. Yoshi was right, he's perfect.




 
 
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