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2003-2017. Now there's a span of years ...

I'm not a very active Gaian. Not anymore. But I'm having fun playing Battle Cows (Lake Kindred) and bashing things. And discovering new shinies via the RIGs from Lake Kindred.

So many items though that I lose track of even what I have ... multi-pose items threw my old inventory system for such a loop. Old patterns and systems don't work anymore. Still haven't figured that out.

Wish I could sell more than 30 items at a time. And pull up a window that just shows me what I have doubles of. And figure out how to evolve my Echo. Suspect it needs more leveling but it's easier to hit things with cows, and much more entertaining.

On the sixth, I'm getting married to the most wonderful man I have ever met.

I can't wait.

I'll be offline for some time after that. I have a honeymoon to enjoy and internet is likely to be spotty as we'll be spending a lot of time on the road. So if you see a little less of me, that will be why.

Twelve days ... wowsa.

Yup. Still works.

Nope, still not dead.

Any and all rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated.

For the curious who are poking around and trying to find juicy, juicy gossip, sorry, there is none! I stepped down from the mod team on good terms. I did so because I'm looking to focus on real life for a while. Sorry!

I just found an old, old house which I am set to move into ... err ... soon. o,o The plan was today, but chaos rules life, as always, so tomorrow seems more likely. I am hoping to take a stab at running my own business. But I have a loooooot of work to do before I get to that stage. Right now just getting the house up to speed, cleaning the parts that really need a good clean, and getting rid of the junk the people who were there before me left is going to be my focus.

I'm excited, but a bit nervous. I've never set out to do repairs on a place before so I have a lot of learning in front of me. But it's all a labor of love, so it all works out. Tell you what though, I'm going to miss the current place in all its craziness. Wild boar trotting up and down the path, monkeys, venomous centipedes --- wait. Maybe I won't miss living here so much.

^^ I have some great stories about my soon-to-be-old place though and I wouldn't have traded living here for the past year and a half for anything.

I'm not sure what, if any internet I'll have for the next couple of weeks. Also, as a non-mod I find myself increasingly stumped in regards to just what to do with myself on Gaia. I've been hanging out on a mule and chatting there. It entertains me, at any rate. I suspect my time on my terradi account is going to continue to be pretty limited for a while yet. I just ... don't know what to do with myself. That, and I kinda feel weird to be a regular user. People keep expecting me to know stuff.

Thing about the modding world is, things change. If you don't keep your hand in it, you do miss things. I haven't been paying attention to the mod world since I stepped down at the beginning of August. So any updates on this mini wings contest? Clueless. Any recent glitches? Ditto. xD Many of you probably have a better idea of what's going on than I do. And that's fine with me. Maybe I can use all that brain space I used to dedicate to learning about glitches to learning kanji so I can finally become something resembling literate in Japanese.

And I'm just musing now. So I'll call it a night and leave it at this.

Take care all! Especially you current and incoming mods. heart You do a difficult and much needed job and I love ya for it.

Nothing to do with my life, I swear. I just like this song. I don't know why.

Mesh - Little Missile

Stop, breathe, no one's been deceived
Go, leave, there's nothing to believe in anymore
Little Missile
Close your eyes and smile
There's no lying
As you detonate their dreams when you're safely outside
Little Missile
Where do you draw the line?
There's no crying
'Cause you're saving up all your tears for another life
Stop, breathe
You never asked to stay
They've seen it all before
A hundred times and more
Faces cold and grey
An invitation to somebody's final day
You said it wouldn't kill you
Terrify or thrill you
Did you mean to say
You didn't need the money anyway, anyway
Little Missile
Close your eyes and smile
There's no lying
As you detonate their dreams when you're safely outside
Little Missile
Where do you draw the line?
There's no crying
Cause you're saving up all your tears for another life
Stop, breathe
How you can reconcile
When you can be so rich
And feel so vile
It's a well-spent day
The celebration of another useful lay
You said he never tapes you
Violates or shapes you
Could you truly say
He never really touched you anyway, in any way
Little Missile
Close your eyes and smile
There's no lying
As you detonate their dreams when you're safely outside
Little Missile
Where do you draw the line?
There's no crying
'Cause you're saving up all your tears for another life
Stop
Breathe
No love letters
Makes life better
No one's been deceived
Little Missile
Close your eyes and smile
There's no lying
As you detonate their dreams when you're safely outside
Stop, breathe, no one's been deceived
Go, leave, there's nothing to believe in anymore
there's nothing to believe in anymore (echo)

Cruxshadows - Cassandra

Watching backwards as life like pictures
Stinging thoughts, born with phantoms
We danced above a world forgotten
Moments cherished... even now
A train-wrecked heart loves fairy tales
Singing from a gaping wound
However time has left unsettled
My memories play out of tune

You can't unmake a cold mistake
You can't undo the hearts you break
You can't erase the poet's fate
Not even if you try

And she had Audrey Hepburn's smile
With deeper sadder eyes
The only thing she said
No one hears Cassandra cry
Because the earth is standing still
And the truth becomes a lie
A choice profound is bittersweet
No one hears Cassandra cry

A heartfelt sorrow I believe
Offered this for passion's crime
A crippled satellite trapped in orbit
My memories play out of time

You can't unmake a cold mistake
You can't undo the hearts you break
You can't erase the poet's fate
Not even if you try...

The listless price of my descension
Where emptiness has pulled me down
Cascading from my divagation
Below the frozen winter skies
Pythonic sadness unreleased
As serpents rigid in the cold
Waiting for the warmth of Sunday
Before the cruelty of growing old

Are you listening?
Are you listening?
Are you listening now?
Like Orpheus with hope entangled
Your path was mapped about your feet
Leading backwards into forgiveness
Or forward to a fools retreat

They aren't mine, but I found them/they found me. This isn't a chainletter, please don't spam it to people for good luck or whatever. But if you find wisdom here, please feel free to take it. smile


1. Respect others, even if they don't respect you. Later in life they may remember that respect.

2. Love with your whole heart. It may be broken, but you can't say that you never loved.

3. Treat animals with kindness, and it will be repaid to you a hundredfold.

4. Be honest with the people you love. Honesty really IS the best policy.

5. Admit your mistakes; it shows you are human.

6. Learn from your mistakes, but don't dwell on them. Negative thinking will only make you depressed -- and that's not good for you or those around you.

7. Tell your family often that you love them. You never know when it will be the last time you get to say it.

8. Never tell others that their dreams are stupid or dumb. Each of us is entitled to our dreams. Who are we to say they won't come true?

9. Realize that the only person you can change is yourself.

10. Be thankful for everything you have. Knowing you are blessed isn't arrogant or cocky if you're truly thankful for your blessings.

"So," said the princess, after years of waiting for the knight in shining armor, "guess he's not coming."

After a moment of thought and a few select curses, she kicked off her high heels and donned some sturdy boots and set off to rescue herself.

For those not in the know, my hair is now cut, permed, and colored. It's been a long time since I did anything to my appearance. To me, it's quite a big change.

As well, it's so ... amazing to look in a mirror and to be like ... hey, I like that person.

I'm someone who spent a lot of middle school angsting because I thought I was ugly and unlovable. It's nice to know that, even if no one here gives me a second glance, I can look at myself and be happy with what I see. I'll take that.

One step at a time, right?