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You know, when I was little we always watched TGIF on television together and before we went to bed we'd watch Family Matters; that show with Steve Urkal (sp?).
Back then TGIF meant sitting with my family, watching our favorite show, and eating popcorn...
...Now, for me, it literally means Thank God It's Friday.


*big sigh*

School is so hectic! Because we switched from 80 minute periods to 40 minute periods and all the high school teachers aren't used to teaching in such short time frames, we get stuck with homework in at least half from our 10 periods! So, after school, I come home, do half my homework while doing a load of laundry or something of that sort, make dinner & clean up afterwards, practice my clarinet, do some more homework, and squeeze in some leisurely reading with my flashlight (which broke the other day cry ) and then fall asleep,, only to wake up a 5:30 so I can take a freakin shower.

Thank God I'm not in robotics anymore. The last thing I need is to get up at 3:30 tomorrow to go to a stinking competition.

Of course, I feel really bad about it. I mean, I know that I'm not an important asset to the team, but I do feel bad about just leaving. I just seem to be drifting away from all of my friends... My seat was moved away from my friends in chemistry, I have to get my seat moved in English because of my bad test grades (I spend way too much time talking to my friends instead of paying proper attention in that class, because, like chemistry, we got to choose our seats), I've decline atleast 7 invintations from various friends --to see movies, spend the night, and just hang out--, I rarely get on aim anymore, and now I am not in robotics.

It just feels weird not going to the competition and all. I knew it would but still.... I mean, I quit because it was driving my dad nuts. He hated that I wasn't building and that I was spending so much time with it last year. He is right though: I definately need to be spending more time at home. Besides, robotics just isn't something for me. It's not one of those extracurricular activities that is noticed by colleges and right now I need to start focusing on my future. Also, build-season is during IRC which means I'd spend every night at 'botics instead of reading.

Everything is just falling down around me, like the crumbling walls of the Roman Colosseum. It sort of reminds me of a poem that I wrote in seventh grade.

Why does everything come crashing down
When your world is great and grand?
Whether it is planes into buildings,
Or a tuba's mistake in the band.
Why, when everything is peaceful,
A death or terrorism takes its toll?
Why, when everything is understood,
Does confusion gain control?
Why, when everyone is happy,
The sky turns dark and gray?
Why can't everything be perfect...
And just stay that way?

I know, I know... it's gotta be the cheesiest damn thing you ever read but *shrugs* I am a cheesey person.

One of my friends said I am too self-pitying today and she is right. Another one of my friends agreed. I wish I could just shut up and stop complaining so that people would think better of me, but no, I always have to open my big fat mouth!


Okay now happy things:
We have our football game tonight and the weather is actually nice! I have had more than enough of the rain. I love the rain but it has caused me to miss out on walking to school and going on runs with my brother. (I feel my gut gettin larger eek ) However, as I look out the window right now, all I see is blue skys! Hmmm, isn't there a song like that?

Today was fun! In all of my classes (except English) we fooled around quite a bit. We also had picture day and thanks to Suzy, I think I may have looked halfway presentable! I hate having my picture taken but, for some odd reason, I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE IT! This is my first school picture without my braces so I hope it turns out okay...

Speaking of stuff that is okay, I have something that doesn't even slightley pertain to what I was just talking about! Okay, maybe I did bump my head too hard on the luch table today but *exclamation* I almost got a chance to talk to this guy that I kindadon't/kindado have a crush on. If only Mr. Henty would give us more time before and after class... all I want is to start up some sort of conversation with him so I can verify my feelings because right now I am so confused it isn't even funny! Well, actually it is. Rofl. Yeah, I crack myself... wait what was I talking about?

Halfway through this entry I did my afternoon situps to try to get rid of all this excess blubber of mine so all together, its taken me too long to write this entry...
... I have to go start getting ready for our football game, maybe that will put me in better spirits. Football games are always fun!
To put it plain and simple:
heart I love band, band is my life. heart