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Some very old, but very decent poetry... |
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WARNING: WRITING IS MY RELEASE.
IT IS MY MEDICAL MENTAL AND PHYSICAL SPIRITUAL INTERCOURSE.
Some of these are very old.
Some aren't.
Here we go...
This is for the daughters,
Who carry their sisters in their arms,
Until they're old enough
To carry on the tradition of mistakes.
"Twas made by my mother,
And she survived
So maybe I can too."
This is what they tell themselves
When they look in the mirror and see
The woman that abandoned them
In those years so long ago.
But just keep living.
Yeah, just keep giving.
Because it's your effort
Your drive
Your passion
Your regret
That will one day inspire
An author to write a novel
That will make society
Better understand your existence in the world.
For better or for worse.
And what's worse?
Knowing that you're forgotten or just not important enough
To be remembered
By those who claim to be the supposed image of friends and family.
Yeah, this is for the actress.
Who paints her face each day
Before lying to the whole world
With the illusion that she is perfect
And never sheds a tear.
"What do I really fear?"
This is what she asks herself
When she stares down at the crowds
Of adoring sheep.
Who claim they wish they were her,
And who think
Their lives are not fulfilled and never will have
The said success that society now wishes to impress
Upon our childeren.
The guiding lights of our revolution.
But just keep living.
Yeah, just keep giving.
Because it's your effort
Your drive
Your passion
Your regret
That will one day inspire,
A child to live her dreams.
To ignore what her family claims to be true,
And follow her heart.
Straight into the chaos.
This is for the artists,
Who never spend a day of their lives
Without the pain.
The pain that comes
With expressing your deepest desires
Without giving a care
To what the world may have to say.
"I'll tell our people to smile,
Even if they can never be happy."
This is what they tell themselves,
While making their greatest work
That won't even be famous
Until they have passed.
But it's better to be remembered for your talent and vision
Than your mistakes.
But just keep living,
Yeah, just keep giving.
Because its your effort
Your drive
Your passion
Your regret
That will one day inspire
A woman in great sorrow
To go on living.
Because she knows
That if her daughter comes home from school
And finds that her lovely drawings of her "hero"
Were not enough
To keep her mother content
With a life that she chose for the better of her daughter.
For the chance that she would live her dreams
And walk down the alter happy.
And this is for the teachers,
Who think that this day is not like the rest.
For the ones that give all the students a hug,
Before they leave for the summer.
For the ones that shed a tear during every ceremony.
"Tomorrow is another day,
It will all be ok."
This is what they tell themselves,
As they try to hide their tears
For the boy near the window.
Who found aluminum foil and a snowy powder
In his father's sock drawer,
And then confessed it
To the only person in his life
That his existence means anything to.
But just keep living,
Yeah, just keep giving.
Because its your effort
Your care
Your passion
Your drive
That will one day inspire
That same little boy
To mature with the realization
That he is not his father.
That he does not have to carry on
The traditions of mistakes he saw in his past.
Just let it all go,
And go.
Go.
Out into the world,
And remember that your past is only a fraction of who you truly are.
And remember the daughters,
The mothers.
Artists, teachers, and sons
That lead this revolution.
*****
“Yeah it’s okay”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I want you to be happy. Don’t worry, it’s fine.”
Click.
Those were the words that have haunted me.
Why the hell did I ever tell you that lie?
Now I lay here and cry,
Crying that one day soon I hope to die…
But not before…
I show you…
That you’re mine.
Yes, I said I was fine.
But you’re already mine!
Yes, I told you I was fine.
But you know that you’re mine!
I’ll still lie to you and say that I’m ******** fine!
BECAUSE I’M WAITING FOR THE DAY THAT I CAN SHOW YOU…
YOU STILL ARE MINE!
Can she do for you what I could?
Can she make you scream like you know I would?
Can she kiss you and you tell her you love her…?
No…
YOU ONLY SAY IT BECAUSE SHE THINKS YOU SHOULD!
Yes, I said I was fine.
But you’re already mine!
Yes, I told you I was fine.
But you know that you’re mine!
I’ll still lie to you and say that I’m ******** fine!
BECAUSE I’M WAITING FOR THE DAY THAT I CAN SHOW YOU…
YOU STILL ARE MINE!
How do you expect me to tell you now…?
That your lips were the first girl’s to touch mine…
DOES IT MAKE YOU HAPPY TO KNOW THAT YOU VIOLATED ME?
Does it make you smile to know that I never wish to feel again?
Well I hope it does because tonight…
It’s her, yours and my ******** end!
Yes, I said I was fine.
But you’re already mine!
Yes, I told you I was fine.
But you know that you’re mine!
I’ll still lie to you and say that I’m ******** fine!
BECAUSE I’M WAITING FOR THE DAY THAT I CAN SHOW YOU…
YOU STILL ARE MINE!
I had that dream again…
The one of screaming
Crying
Hurt
And… Bleeding…
I now know what it meant.
DO YOU EVEN REMEMBER WHAT THAT RING COULD REPRESENT?!
My love isn’t enough.
My body will not measure up.
STOP LYING TO ME!
JUST SHUT THE ******** UP!
Don’t tell me you still want me.
Stop touching me.
Get away from me.
I don’t want to feel happy.
Especially if it’s caused by you.
You’re a poison.
An infection.
Well I found your antidote…
I’m going to show your body…
That you still belong to me.
I hold you against the wall,
Oh no, that’s not all.
Ha, you ******** slut.
No, you can’t kiss my lips.
So what about now?
Is that hard enough?
Can you still say that you love me?
Even with your blood running down my wrist?
Can you still say you trust me?
Even though I broke you and Kelly’s tryst?
No, get up.
You’re not done.
I sink my teeth into the side of your neck, forcing it to bleed.
The crimson runs down your chest,
It drips all the way down to your c**t.
I’m not going to touch it.
I don’t want to let you feel pleasure.
I want you to feel my pain.
I want you to share my blame.
That’s why when you wake up.
That scar on your neck won’t go away.
She will see that I always have my way.
She is not my equal, not in a single way.
Even when you come crawling back to me…
I’m going to push you away!
*****
I scream,
You scream.
We all scream for methamphetamine!
Addiction.
Attraction.
A natural reaction.
Is worth your conviction?
Possession.
A deadly infection,
Of a mind numbing constriction.
Let’s go, let’s go.
One, two.
Left, right.
Welcome to The March Of Addiction!
Ladies and gentlemice,
If you look to your left you will find speed.
A very deadly device,
Capable of driving a man wild with need;
Then leaving him dying within it’s constrictive vice.
Addiction.
Attraction.
A natural reaction.
Is worth your conviction?
Possession.
A deadly infection,
Of a mind numbing constriction.
Let’s go, let’s go.
One, two.
Left, right.
You know this dance my brother… It’s the March Of Addiction!
Now if you please turn all signals inside the brain off,
Place yourself in a position without any self-worth…
Thank you, The Coke will now begin its inhalant take off.
Come now.
Let’s twitch,
Let’s starve.
Let’s ********.
Let’s let our personalities switch.
Addiction.
Attraction.
A natural reaction.
Is worth your conviction?
Possession.
A deadly infection,
Of a mind numbing constriction.
Let’s go, let’s go.
One, two.
Left, right.
You all have the same dream.
To ascend right into the Castle Of Metal Bars.
Welcome to the march of Addiction!
And now ladies and Gentlemen…
THE FINAL ACT!
First, he will use mere quarters to buy a smoke.
Then… He will do favors for just one toke…
Soon he will be on his knees begging for just one line of Coke!
Let us now watch has he begins to suffocate himself in a constant cloud of menthol.
Now… the Finale!
His final act will be…
DROWNING IN ALCOHOL!
Who know it ladies and gents?
A man has been corralled in a mental fence!
Brought to his knees by a mere liquid!
Oh, how we pity the poor fool.
If only he could have found his own mental lid…
*****
Why can't I stop smiling?
Even in the face of a few people around me who are dying.
I no longer fall asleep crying.
I no longer fear those people out there, rooting for me to fail.
Go ahead you fools, drink your self and world-hating ale.
I need no part in your ridiculous dance.
Trust me, your antics don't even stand a chance.
Not even all the rocks in the world you could throw will shake my balance.
I am my magnum opus.
You're fog and mist will never again cloud up my focus.
I stand on my own feet.
I will never ever admit defeat.
Go ahead, keep trying to erase me.
I am something you will never be able to delete.
I am and have what you don't.
I am strong.
I am myself.
I am creative.
I do not surrender control to another being.
I make my own decisions.
I make my own life.
I've taken those chains you will never escape,
And I have shattered every last speck of them.
So keep trying you fools.
Keep on baying and hanging yourselves in sheds.
After all,
All you are is sheep and tools.
I've seen the things you will never see.
I've drank from the blood of Atlas.
I've held the world upon my shoulders as Herakles tricked the Gods.
I've fought battles you can't even contemplate.
IN
MY
BODY
I
DO
NOT
POSSESS
HATE.
*****
Where is my brother?
No not him, the other.
Where is Uncle Brian, Aunt Kay?
Why did he have to go away?
Where is bri-bri?
Why isn't he here to make me smile so I don't cry?
Because he likes to lie.
He also likes to drown.
Deep into the pit of addiction.
Down, down, down.
Every rabbit-hole has an end Brian...
But this time.. That good ole district judge... He ain't buyin'
No...
It all ends here.
You are not my brother.
You have changed into another.
So go on, sip that beer.
At least it won't leave you, right?
Even if you use it...
Why couldn't you see?
That it wasn't just me!
Ed,
Chris,
Amber,
Mom,
Dad,
Joseph,
Ben,
Jack,
And the other sister you betrayed... Ebee...
I guess the bars are now your family...
Have fun, because I know that even after you get out of those...
You'll still be in them...
So where is my brother?
Well, he's turned into another.
A stranger,
A danger...
Another hero..
Another mindless mishap.
So any other questions?
Or do I have to recap?
*****
How is it that you see
Right through me?
How can it be,
That you're brave enough to show how you feel for me?
Why do you even believe,
In the strength inside of me?
I used to be a girl who knew how she would operate,
But ever since you,
My mind and my heart can't seem to cooperate.
Somehow I know
That even after every argument or debate,
I'll end up in your arms, wishing you'd never let go.
Every morning I wake up I ask why.
Why is it that you've chased away my storm?
Why does every day seem to have a blue sky,
And why does the sun suddenly seem so warm?
How is it that you see
Right through my armor?
How can it be, that I'm feeling what you feel for me?
When you're in my arms I can only think,
"I'll die if I ever harm her."
Before you,
I could fight the tears,
And run away from the fears.
Now all I can do,
Is whisper, "I love you too."
You flew into my heart, and filled the void.
That place that grew so cold hiding what I truly wanted.
The word I would kill myself just to avoid.
I can laugh again,
I can feel my own beauty within.
Are you an angel,
Or my greatest sin?
How is it that you could see,
Right through the mask I wore just to hide "me?"
Why did you bother to make this last,
When the strongest voice inside me is screaming to remember the past.
You've made me forsake the pain.
Forget the blame.
Because of your strength,
I can face the day.
What is the overwhealming feeling from beneath?
Why are those three words the only ones I long to say?
Don't count the days,
Don't look toward the hours.
Just memorize the ways,
And all times,
And all the words that you captivated my heart with.
All the times I wanted to run away.
And all the times you held on, and wouldn't let go.
If I hadn't found you,
My heart may have never known
That's it's not fully grown.
That I still have days to breathe,
And that my soul no longer needs to seethe.
My nights no longer contain blame.
My days seem so bright.
But my nightmare is that you're the same,
And that this will all die of fright.
Then I remember how you held me that night,
And told me I didn't have to hurt.
How you pulled me under your wing,
And picked me up off the dirt.
I love you so much it makes my heart sing.
All I'm trying to say,
Is that I adore you.
That I'm here to stay,
But most of all...
That I love you for you,
And you're perfect in every single way.
****
I walk these halls I long to forsake.
Rip the eraser from my pencil and press it to my skin.
This place will die from what we forgot to make.
One day they might filch through the ash and rubble, then remember when
When the days seem liked they were meant to be lived,
Of the days when people knew how to forgive.
I look up to see the faces pressed against the glass,
The colorful faces of those days not so long ago in the past.
They're breathing, but the eyes are stolid.
Still, held in a gaze with lack of purpose.
Their bodies are frozen in false security, rock-solid.
Should I assist them?
Should I end their benign suffering,
Or should I focus on my own?
I'm not ashamed of what I long for,
To become lifeless and alone.
To be surrounded by others like myself in a pasture of grass and stone.
But then I record the voices and touches of the others.
Play it back.
Count the seconds,
1...
2...
10...
1,000,000...
I love them all so very much,
But then why do the dark times feel so much stronger?
"You don't have to face it alone."
If that's true,
Then where are you?
Too scared I might be right?
That this existence is pointless,
And all of we creatures are heartless...?
*****
When asked I always say the same thing,
"She was my first."
But what I don´t say is what I lock away; a feeling.
You haunt me so that I´ve been convinced, you were a curse.
I swear, after your death I didn´t think it could get any worse.
I guess I was wrong.
Because every time I look in the mirror
I see my greatest fear.
Most nights I have to scream just to remind myself you´re gone.
I think you know that every time I looked into her eyes I saw yours.
It´s like you engraved this dogma in my mind,
"I´m the one that´s blind.
They´ll never measure up to you.
They´re all just whores."
Every day after you is another lie.
I walk those halls with my head held so high,
But they´ll never know.
Soon it will be my time to go,
And they will always wonder why...
"Why did she never cry?"
****
Every breath feels like another regret.
Another tear falls,
The phone rings.
Who is it this time who calls?
I keep trying to breathe,
But my heart has stopped, expanded, swollen.
My lungs tighten around it like a noose.
I gasp for release.
I hang suspended in air,
Begging to have just a little of it.
Is this really how it will always be?
Is this who I am going to see in the mirror in a year?
Will I still be me?
I'd like to convince myself, lead myself to a comforting false reality.
But nothing is black and white.
Nothing is simplistic.
I want to wake up.
Want to see a different person in that mirror.
Want to find a reason to show my face to the world.
I envy the barbies, the kens, the britneys and the christinas.
They don't have to create art to become beautiful.
They simply "are."
I'd love to lie to myself about all these things.
I know I have a strength no one else has.
I know I am unique.
I know I am my own creation.
So why do I still cry at night?
Because I can never be whole...
Without her..........................................................................
****
What is it that I feel?
I’ve never experienced it before.
I never thought I could actually heal.
I’d always thought that there was no more.
Now I know, you were there all along.
You took my hand and endowed me with strength,
I’ve been without you for far too long.
Now we will be together until the end of time’s length.
Now I know where I belong…
Here in your arms,
I feel safe.
Held by your gaze,
I feel beautiful.
Feeling your lips press against mine,
I’ve never known this much bliss.
I wake up each day,
Only to smile and greet the day happily.
I no longer cry in my sleep,
Because by your side I know I’ll never again weep.
You truly are my only love.
How did I become so content?
I will always swear you were brought to me from above.
I know now I shall never again be tortured by lament.
Because being by your side…
I’ve never known any other place I’d rather reside.
Here in your arms,
I feel safe.
Held by your gaze,
I feel beautiful.
Feeling your lips press against mine,
I’ve never known this much bliss.
How did this happen so easily?
Your love just kept hanging there suspended in fear.
It drove me mad, every second hating its teasing.
With you I know that I can still be strong, even if I shed a tear.
With you,
I don’t have to lie.
With you,
I no longer wish to die.
With you,
I know I can still cry.
With you…
Every day is one full of love,
And all I can do is sit here and smile as I watch our time spin by.
*****
Another addict... Looking for his fix...
Why Brian?
How could you do this?
To yourself, to us...
Well, I know you probably don't care that I'm laying here crying.
Why Brian?
Do you know that with every sip,
You get that much closer to dying?
I can't speak to you.
I can't see you.
Because you don't see me,
Or Mom
Or Dad
Or Chris
Or Ed
Or Joseph
Or Jack
Or Ben
Even Ebee.
Why couldn't you see me, though?
That promise you made me.
That we made.
Did you mean it?
Or did you just want me to shut up?
I don't know that guy in Harris County Penatentury,
He's a stranger to me.
*****
I see your eyes when I close mine.
At that haunting hour
On the day when I will shrink back and cower.
They all keep asking, but I just shrug it off and repeat, "I'm fine."
I'm a record player,
And I keep repeating her song,
"A selfish slayer."
Every time I let someone close enough to change the song,
Maybe even one day change the album.
I run.
Most days I just want to say, "Aw phuck it, I'm done."
Give up.
Abdicate.
Concede.
Conform...
Just feel the pavement.
It understands my lament.
Just feel the cold steel.
I wish I couldn't feel.
I want to wake up,
Instead of giving up.
I want to rewind,
I hope it's you I find.
I miss you so much,
I'll never again feel your touch.
Somehow you've molded me into the best parts of you.
You marked my flesh.
Raped my soul.
Carved your sick ambition into my mind.
When will I ever find...
The girl who can make my heart stop.
The one who can have me either way, but likes to kiss me ontop.
But why is it your tears that haunt my fears?
Why is it my horrid dreams that make me think of all these things?
Sometimes I can still hear your voice,
Begging me
Pleading me
Bleeding for me
To make that choice.
But I was a coward.
A traitor.
Your martyr.
Your pathetic little lottie.
I never knew another human being could do so much to change me.
I look in the mirror,
And you're behind me.
Your hands upon me.
Your eyes penetrating mine.
I'm fine
I'm fine
I'm fine
I'm fine
I'm fine
I'm fine
You were the holocaust inside my heart.
My reason for never allowing myself to cry.
The one thing that destroys my will to try.
The girl who tore me apart.
~Annaid Tnecniv Soienitrep~
****
The Republic has fallen.
Difference!
The Storm is brewing.
Fear!
The sheep begin to sense their benign execution.
False Laws enforce the Tyrant
As he sits on his throne of oil and blood...
Laughing
Lying
Licking at the bones of the executed.
Hungry for more blood.
More screams
More pain
More sacrifices...
Stop viewing the loss of the innocent with indifferent eyes.
Cease the conceding.
Deny conforming.
Listen, and dissect the lies.
Stop this Destructive Standardize.
Realize!
See the freedom that every individual has been denied.
Talk,
To the ones who have defied.
At the core we're all the same,
So yes, curse me.
For I am saying that we are all to blame.
I take my mental knife and thrust it toward the sky.
The pathetic, blind, fearful sheep still ask why.
I keep screaming that it's all a lie.
And why...?
To one day storm the steps where the wicked now reside.
To see my fellow WOMAN walk the streets; alive.
To look into THEIR eyes and force THEM to listen to our cries...
"WE
KNEW
YOU
LIED!"
*****
You think of me the way you think of the unbreakable.
My urge for you, it used to be uncontainable.
I tried to satisfy, but I guess it wasn't enough.
You say you love me, well baby...
I guess that's tough!
So here I go,
I'm gunna stand on my own.
I'm gunna make it all alone.
I don't need you to carry me there,
I'm going alone now, 'cause you just don't care.
But, despite everything,
I think it's time that we just say goodbye.
Despite everything,
Oh yeah, just let her hold you while you cry.
Despite everything,
I'm gunna tell you to go.
Despite everything,
I won't even look at you when you say "Hello."
Despite everything,
I don't need you anymore.
Remember those nights we used to stay up and whisper,
To each other how this would last forever?
Well I guess we found a wall,
That's why I won't ever answer your call.
I can't take the pain,
'Cause everytime you speak I'm engulfed with blame.
Your words keep dripping from lips that show no soul,
I hear your lies, but it seem the truth has disappeared.
Maybe one day I'll wake up and finally be whole,
But I really feel that's going to end the way I've always feared.
But, despite everything I don't regret where I am now,
I know they look at me and I bet they wonder, "How?"
Despite everything, I can't tell you why,
But for some reason now, I swear I can't even cry!
*****
I sit here and stare
Out into the cold night air.
I am comforted and warmed
By the feel of my lips tonight.
But oh my darling why does it have to be this way?
Oh, couldn't you feel my heart pounding against yours that fatefull day?
Just when your eyes met mine
I knew I was going to cross that line.
I gazed at you,
Wondering how I could ever want
Anyone but you because just the mere thought of you is a passionate taunt.
Oh, couldn't you see,
That when your hand was trembling I held it in mine?
Couldn't you hear the words I whispered to you?
I meant them with everything I am, but still I was used like a tool.
Oh, my darling.
Will you ever return to my arms again?
All I ever wanted was to make you feel more loved than you've ever been.
Just wait my love.
I tell you I won't let you go just yet.
I dreamt of your lips that night as I fell into slumber sent from above.
And so my dear, it's your choice tonight.
Leave me alone here to be glared at by the bitter moon's white light.
Or come back to me so that I may show you love's true sight...
*****
A jaded gaze,
Set by a constant state of solitude.
She walks to the precipice shaking.
She cannot believe that all this time, that wretch was faking.
She gazes down at the wreckage that is her immortal story.
She holds her lover in her arms and tells her not to worry.
This is the decadent lie
"This is the place, where I shall die..."
The wind stings her wounds
As sun haunts the day without the promise of the foreboding moons.
She stalks through the forest of embezzlement
The sounds of her own screams are drowned out...
By the waterfall of jealousy.
"Don't give up yet."
She still stands shaking there.
"Don't run away."
She just keeps sobbing into the cold night air.
"I won't abandon you."
Her hands still hold the memories of pain.
"I'll mend your heart."
She has only herself to blame.
"I'll chase away your sorrow."
Her tears begin to pour.
"I swear I am yours."
The searing wind now dies to a calm.
"I love you."
And the blood then begins to pour from her palm.
Just like a waterfall of jealousy.
She stands upon the fallacy of disgrace,
Tempted by the glassy waters' embrace.
In this philosophy of hypocrisy,
The endless symbology of love's mythology now fazes her.
Was she ever meant to exist?
These thoughts penetrate and demolish her bliss.
The Goddess stands on the brink of desecration.
She knows the hour is nearing.
She ignores the information.
"Let it go, move on." This is what she keeps hearing.
She will not listen.
"I won't let you go."
She knows where her true loyalties lie.
"I miss you so."
She won't let them take her.
"I have one wish, just to feel your kiss."
She can feel the poison take its toll.
"I will save you from yourself."
She can feel their lies pierce her heart and penetrate her soul.
And just as the waterfall engulfs her...
She realizes she was finally whole...
*****
It happens that I am tired of loving.
It happens that I now loathe the sound of your voice.
It happens that thine beauty of both body and person ist the bane of mine love's detestable yet diserable existence.
So why then o' my fair haired Goddess must you torment and treat me so?
Why must you have me think one thing, and another know?
Thou must be ashamed of mine love.
For of mine love for thou mine fellow friends do knowest.
But what of yours?
For thou proclaimed thy love in thine faithful vow.
But of mine love knowest not your friends allow?
I beseech thee to take heed in this dreadfull game you play with mine heart.
You asked of me once and I answered,
But yet I still do look to that fatefull day wence this game of lust shall end and faithfull love shall start.
I welcome your hand as mine guide,
But only wence thou hast stopped this inconstant jest of seek and hide.
*****
"Thine sight is blinded by love's tempting hand"
This is what they tell me.
This is what they say when I tell them what I now have the right to demand.
Oh how I wish those fools could see.
I�ve made my choice.
Soon I shall be able to wake every morrow to the sound of thy voice.
You are the brightest light in the darkest corner of my mind,
Only your face in the crowd can I find.
And your love, your passion, your care� That is something I shall never leave behind.
They tell me to stay,
�One day, it�ll all be ok.�
That is all they have to say.
But I can only hear what you say,
And I remember those words you told me that day�
�Come What May.�
Every second of pain, every word of hate, every agonizing touch of them,
Is just another I must endure.
I don�t have this strength because of the good grace of Him�
Take me away,
To a place where I can no longer hear all they have to say.
To the place where I live the dreams I dream every day.
I'll follow if you will lead,
I will be held if you will hold,
Because of you no more will mine eyes bleed,
So let us watch as our perfect plan begins to unfold.
Take me to the place where you will whisper those words in my hear,
Take me to the time when I have nothing left to fear,
To the land where I shall never shed another tear.
You were the one who told me to never hide,
This my love, is what dreams are made of.
So will you always be by my side?
And when I wake up, will you be the one I see above?
*****
Kiss my hand and tell me 'I am yours.'
Caress my skin and whisper 'Ich leibe dich'
She opened all of my locked doors,
She knows this, but I have to keep saying it, 'Du hast mich'
Don't runaway,
Don't let your feeble heart give way.
Don't listen to what they say,
Just hold me in your arms until the sunrise brings with it a new day.
All this craving,
All this waiting.
'For what?' they ask.
Well simply the day where it shall no longer be considered 'mis-behaving,'
The day when I can wake up next to her without that sense of hope fading.
"They'll never know where we've gone,"
She tells me.
So as the days pass the hours seem just as long.
And no matter how hard I try,
I now know I can no longer fight.
I can cry, and I can die, but with love's winged song shall I ever fly
*****
I'll hide behind a smile,
As I watch you lie with such gile.
No, no, no
Don't
Tell me you love me
Don't try to tell me it will be right soon
I can't watch this sun rise until I see the full moon
Set,
Everything was supposed to be so perfect and clear
But now its even worse than I fear.
You go out
Every night
Do I question your alibi?
No, and you want to know why
Well guess what its that b***h called love
I don't have to believe the lies
That you are shoving in my face
I can't break these wings now,
Its the only way my soul will ever fly
I will go wherever you may roam
Just keep telling me the truth.
Hold me close,
Make me feel
Like I'm the only one who's ever been in your arms.
Fly me away,
High through the sky
Erase my pain and fill my life with your..
Your decadent love.
Now I must choose,
But which lie is the truth?
*****
It's intoxicating,
All this longing,
All this waiting.
All for that simple feel of belonging...
So as I lie in bed and dream,
I keep trying to see,
That people are not always as they seem.
Just the thought of your kiss,
Brings me nothing short of pure bliss.
I never saw myself until you showed me through your eyes,
You helped me see through the lies.
And, without you my spirit just dies.
I would follow you,
But only if you asked me to...
What was it we had, you and I?
Was it real or a lie?
Still the longing of you I can't deny.
So why lie?
It's almost taunting,
How the memory of you is so haunting...
Sometimes, all I want is to see your face,
Others, I long for you to wisk me away from this place,
And fly me high, all the way to outerspace.
And other times all I want is just to feel our fingers lace.
We aren't that far,
All we need is a car,
And a surgeon to remove this one love scar...
*****
I watch as the window panes are stained crimson with my blood,
I listen as I hear my body fall to the ground with a thud.
My eyes, now aching from crying tears of love,
Now look toward the sky above.
I look at Him,
He nods to me and tells me never to give up because it would be a sin.
Your words alone are enough to tear me limb from limb.
But those three words... Oh those three words... How I miss them.
You gave me life,
And you took away that knife.
So why have you given up?
Why have you left my side?
How shall I ever abide?
Without you...
Nothing has a taste,
Everthing is gray.
Life now, is no more than a waste,
Because those three words I can no longer listen to you say.
Don't you remember the promise you made to me that day?
That no matter what,
You and I would never give up.
Well, I know you hate me, and I know you have given up.
But... I also know, that you still love me.
Why else is my feeble heart still beating?
I know our love was NOT fleeting.
You ask how I know if any of it was real?
You ask how it can be such a big deal.
My answer...
I am still here...
I can't give up on you,
Not now,
Not ever...
*****
The lips of Destiny caress the child of Disaster's skin.
They look into each other's eyes.
Hypnotized, they embrace.
Dazed, their fingers lace.
She sees the fire in her eyes,
Why doesn't she run?
"It's as warm as the sun," she says.
"I have the power to see her love, even through all the lies."
A mere touch of hand,
That's all it takes.
She collapses into the sand,
"Take me away!" She screams, "I am yours for goodness sakes."
"We'll fly away together," The other whispers.
"I will love you forever," She replies.
The skin of Destiny trembles at the touch of the child of Disaster's hand.
"I love you," She says.
The other simply smiles.
She does not reply,
She just stays inside her darkness.
Inside she longs to die,
"Will I ever gain her forgiveness?" She asks herself.
*****
All that was is finally gone,
So why did it take us so long?
To realize that we were not meant to be,
That your love does not belong to me.
I try to see a light in this darkness you left me in,
But there is none, and I am left in this mess forever asking "When?"
When will I ever learn?
To not let my heart rage and burn.
When did you stop loving me?
And, why couldn't I see?
That we were truely never meant to be.
I love you,
And I know you love me too.
That is why my heart is aching,
This is why I ask myself if you were always faking.
So as I lay here shaking,
What were you going to be taking?
Only my life,
Just my strife.
All of my blithe.
This is what I think of as I look up and see that knife...
 Alucarda Incarnate · Sun Dec 30, 2007 @ 04:32am · 1 Comments |
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