That monster in the mirror.
That constant unmistakable fear.
Guess who caused it Mother, dear?
The same person who somehow wiped away every tear!
Expectations.
Limitations.
Implications.
All pointing not at who I should be,
But how I should be.
What people should see.
Why can't my own mother just love me for me?
Why do I have to be something like in a magazine she might see?
It's never enough for you, is it Mom?
Why do you think that I've tried to make it so that I'd be gone?
I'll never be good enough.
Never measure up.
Never be the daughter you're proud of.
Ironically it's not who I am going to be.
But what people will see.
That is what you care about.
That is what you so long to tout.
I've finally progressed to being able to gaze into a mirror.
Did you even know that used to be my greatest fear?
I know the positive perspective I'm going to end up in.
I'm going to forward myself.
Going to never follow your expectations again.
Never going to be some barbie doll on your shelf.
Sorry, Mom.
I now and forever am myself.
 Alucarda Incarnate · Tue Feb 26, 2008 @ 04:28am · 0 Comments |
