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This will most likely be disturbing to homophobes |
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I will tell you a story...it happened today. My dad caught me telling my boyfriend that I luv(NOT TO BE MISTAKEN WITH LOVE, SPELT WITH AN "O", LUV IS MERELY A SIGN OF AFFECTION) over the phone. And he said, "Aren't you talking to a guy?" I said, "uhhh no." because he has no idea that I am bi. "well, Seth I didn't know you had a girlfriend, why didn't you tell me? You should have her over for dinner or something."
"uhh, no dad, thats not really necisarry, see we just started going out and I don't know her well enough to bring home".
"well Seth if you barely know her then why did you say that you love her?"
"Dad, I never said that, I said "luv" which is a sign of affection, -oh whats that Terri? Oh, yes Im just talking to my dad for a sec."
"oh, yeah sorry Seth, I'll just go"
that was close. But nearly as bad as the time when I had Adam(my ex-boyfriend) sleep over we were doing coupley things and O my god we almost got caught. For example, you have probably done this. You know, nobodys around, you have conversations with obvious inuendos in them? Well, at the particular time I am going to tell you about we were in the kitchen looking for food. I was looking in the fridge and he came over and hugged me from behind. "and what is that?" I asked.
"banana" he replies starting the chain of kitchen /food inuendos.
"really, I have one too, you want one?"
"maybe, Im more in the mood for hard candy, like a lollypop."
"thats not very healthy, maybe something with more protien?" (by the way, apparently semen has a lot of protien, I don't know for sure but thats what I heard)
"oh, I dunno, maybe something creamy, like vanilla ice cream?"
"we don't have any, we have fishsticks but... their pretty small..."
(you get the idea, I know were retarded but its fun and you dont have to think of any real conversation)
Anyways my mom came in and saw him hugging me(from behind) and gave us the wierdest look. "Boys...what are you doing?" she asked half asleep.
Adam tried desperately to look like he was trying to see over my shoulder in to the fridge and I said, "lets be healthy and have fruit" and I grabbed a banana "yeah" Adam agreed and grabbed one and we left "goodnight mom!"
(That actually happened to me, along with things like awakward talks that you think are only given to people in movies)
redface redface .. Flaming a** Pirates We are pirate
 Ass Pirate Fairy Boy · Mon Jul 25, 2005 @ 06:47am · 2 Comments |
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