scratch the continuous dialysis
i didn't hear what they said correctly (i was listening in on phone conversations while reading medical stuff)
he is not on continuous dialysis
he hasn't been on it for the past like 2 days but tomorrow, today i guess now though he is gonna go on it again
but when he does, his blood pressure will lower
so they'll need to give him more blood
(which they already gave him 2 pints last time he had dialysis)
it is impossible for them to keep him permanently on dialysis
and they can't just keep giving him blood like that
sooo
after tomorrow we're going to just have to see how things go
he knows exactly what is happening
he's completely conscious and alert right now and he knows what's going on
but he won't talk about what's going to happen after dialysis tomorrow....
....you really can't blame him though
he's been through so much the past couple years
right after my grandma died, thanksgiving of my 6th grade year (i'm currently in 8th, i don't know what year it was for sure, '05 or '06?)
he started on all of this
i'd imagine he's just getting sick of all this
and as the doctor put it
there are some things worse than dying
they say there is a chance of him dying tomorrow
after the dialysis
but if he doesn't
they don't think that he'll live much past next week
i love him so much and i'll miss him greatly
but i know that it was for the better
he's had soo much stress lately
and in the past couple years
(some of which i am not going to add here)
i guess it is kind of time to say goodbye
really the only thing....that i am....insanely sad and worried about
is my grandfather
two years ago, he watched his beloved wife die
he never showed his weakness to me, or any of my other family
to my knowledge
but i heard him crying
and i always felt so bad
and now, his oldest son's life is coming to an end
they lived in the same house
and lately it's just been him (my grandfather) in that house
when his son dies
i don't know how he's going to take it
but i know that he is a strong man
and i hope that he'll be able to handle it
;3
=/
i'll probably update later today
 erinus is god · Tue Mar 11, 2008 @ 08:19am · 0 Comments |
