I'm so childish. Yesturday I was so worried about my loves little brain fart. after that I went to bed, but the little worry effected me. I woke up early with my head pounding on me with thoughts and fears. I haven't even had breakfast or lunch, I'm just not hungry. all threw the morning I try and tell my self it won't happen, but my brain just keeps coming back with it. Then my love comes msn, and stupid, paranoid me brings her down. i didn't want to do that. I want her happy, but I have to go all jerk like and flare off some jelousy and worry. I hated it that I did that and just wish I could do something right. She says I shouldn't worry, but I can't help it. I use to fear dying, ingorance ruling the world and stuff, but now, what I fear most of all is her not being happy, and her leaving me. my heart is problaly the most immature part of me, never has it gone off like this. Even if she dumps me, if it leads her to be happy, then thats all that matters. and if she reading this, then I hope she knows I love her, and would do whatever it takes to make her happy. Even if this fear is stupid, I'll most likly go to fear all day.it'll problaly take some time for my brain to shut down with this worry. All and all, there's one thing I'd like to say. Jen, I'm sorry for my behavior, I'm sorry for worrying, and sorry for bringing you down. please forgive me.
sunshade Community Member |
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