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I really like this boy... But i hate myself so much, i can't get close to him... I don't want to hurt him... He hurts so much... I wish he would just tell me what he wants me to do... I want to know him... But i don't yet know myself... Its all confusing, and depressing... The only reason i can write this in you journal, is because no one ever reads you, and he can't get on Gaia... I just... Want him to hold me... Just a moment longer, just a moment at all... I need someone now... But i have no one... Neechee stays with me, but he can't comfort me... I just want to feel love... I don't know what it is... I still wish it to exist, but i know, almost for sure, it isn't really. Just society's bull... Like always... I have to go, i don't want to cry anymore...