Hey Journal... How have you been...? Me, not so good... I won't post any of it though... I sent it to Corey in an e-mail... But then how he looked at me... I wanted to cry... And not tears of joy... cry I hurt everyone... I only told him because not telling him was hurting him... And it was hurting me... In more ways than one... Jiko would understand that... Yeah, thats Corey's nickname, Jiko. ... He's at work right now... Washing dishes... At least he has a job... I'm such a loser... I can't do anything... I just want to make him happy... And Arucard over there talking about "Oh, i love San, San is great, I Love San, San and i just had a baby, ..." Blah, blah, blah... Love isn't real... We were talking about all of this stuff during class like, two weeks ago i think... And i was worried that he would see the note, since it would have been rude and plain out stupid to verbally discuss it... Since i sit next to Jiko... 4laugh But anyway, i don't believe in love. I stopped. But i do care for him... But i can never "love" him, so why bother pursueing him...? I hate everything... I hate myself... I'm going to die... I wish it were soon...
