What am I waiting for? A miracle.
This design... brilliant self-collapsing. If only you could see the image in my mind that is a metaphor for the way I feel about my life. For every piece that gets closer to the top to form a point it collapses inward as much. Therefore the point, just like any goals I have in life simple or great, is not reachable. I am the design. The fact that it keeps going is the fact that I keep trying. The only way to stop it... death. Suicide? No. I'll only do it as much as I tried to do it yesterday and everyday before that, and tomorrow and everyday after that. I'm still here aren't I? Sometimes I have my doubts. Sometimes I think I'm dead and I'm just here waiting for the impossible, death. That is what I'm truly waiting for, my actions have not shown otherwise. I know too well that miracles don't come. There are only false hopes.
I am not taking the chances. I don't know how to. I need examples in life. I need to be shown how to do something before I can do it myself. There is so much I will never know how to do. I want you to tell me what to do because I don't know what to do myself.
I never thought much of my thoughts why should you. This is just a psycho-man babble. Dead-man trance.
 niatsu · Sat Jun 06, 2009 @ 08:39am · 0 Comments |
