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Due to the fact that I am unable/unwilling to pick up where I left off, we're starting over with this series! yaaaay

A well dressed man in a black suit and tie stands before a tied up cockroach-like creature. The man's name is Gerrome Stallone, and he, like myself, is a gangster. We caught this cockroach on the Boss' birthday. He and a few of his buddies thought they'd crash the party, and one of them vaporized the Boss' son, Leon.

"Y'know, it's in your best interest to start talking now," Gerrome said as he slid on some laser-padded brass knuckles, "cuz I'm a really impatient man, y'see, and I just might lose my temper."

"Joo think I give up my brothers to a piece of chit monkey like you? What joo gonna do, eh? Throw your poopoo at me?" the bug responded arrogantly. We both knew he wasn't going to give it up that easily. Hell, I think Gerrome was glad to hear that. As soon as it stopped talking, Gerrome started wailing on it. Sometimes it's difficult to watch when Gerrome gets like this. He pounded and pounded on the pathetic creature, cracking its exoskeleton with each blow. Its yellow blood splattering all over the place. Eventually, he caused one of its eyes to pop, and that's when I pulled him back. "Hey, that's good. Don't hit him too much, dead men can't give up their friends." I said to Gerrome as I pulled him back.

"Yeah, all right, Lenny, you're the boss," Gerrome chuckled to me as he backed away, still bouncing from the adrenaline rush. I gave the roach a few slaps to make sure he was awake. "You gonna tell us where your friends are, or are we gonna have to make this much worse?"

"Why donchu stick your finger up you a** and lick it, joo filthy monkey," he said and then spat a mouthful of blood on my face. I took a handkercheif out of my pocket, and wiped my face clean. I took a little taste of the blood off the handkerchief. "Hm, not bad. Yo, Gerry, you want a taste of this?" I said to him. "No thanks"

"You are a tasty specimen. I bet I could cook you up and you'd be delicious."I taunted him, as I reached down to my suitcase, and pulled a special gun out. "Do you know what this is? This is a microwave gun. See, I just point this at whatever I want, and pull the trigger," I demonstrate by shooting it in the leg, "and viola, a nice little snack to keep me going on my long trips to take care of scumbags like you."

The roach winced in pain, but did not respond. "Well? Say something. Tell me what I want to know, or I'm gonna cook you alive. Is that what you want?" I asked him. He stared at me with anger in his one remaining eye. "******** joo!" he shouted in defiance. And with that, I began blasting him in the abdomen. He screamed in agony as his shell started bubbling. His body was desperately struggling to escape the binds we put him in, but he could not escape. He only had one option.

"Wait! Wait, I'll tell joo what I know!" he cried out. I stopped blasting him, "About ********' time," I said, rather irritated at how long that took. "Dey live in a cave on Venus, near the city of Calbrane..."

"You ********' roaches, you're lucky we don't kill your whole species, you bunch of slimy parasite mother ********!" Gerrome started going off. We then pulled out laser edged knives, and stabbed the roach in the torso. "Eh?! What are joo doing?!" it protested.

"You didn't really think we'd let you live after what you did to Leon, did ya?" I said as we cut a big hole in him. Then I reached in, and tore its heart out, and took a bite.

"Disgusting."