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The Truth... And nothing but... |
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I am at a stance of appaulment at the cause of desire that I now have. For I know now more than I ever have before, that I truly do love her. The only fear I do have in my mind is not so much the concern of whether or not she cares for me in the same way, but rather the fact that every day that passes my love grows stronger and deeper. So does my desire. I truly hope to believe that she somehow feels an inclination of a similar feeling, but one can only hope; can't one? I yearn for nothing less than to feel the grasp of her hand as she wisks me away to that place she so fondly calls 'our home.' I know our time is not far, but every waking moment that passes puts me that much closer to it, and yet that much farther from it. I am attempting to let all of my torment, my angst, my desire, and my jealousy, however great, pass within all due time. I am aware of what I must do and how I much act if I am to go through with this. I know because that is the same reason I have not yet fled on my own. I must wait, and in due time; it will be our time.
She claims to love her, she claims to love him, and she claims to love them. Yet somehow, however much I see her exclaiming of her love for others, I still cling to the suggestion that she loves me above all the others. I could be incredibly wrong, or I could be so right that it would set my face complete pale or red. I'd like to think that we have passed through the stage of confusion and pain, but I know this to be untrue. And, however large my torment and pain is now; it shall only become worse, until the day my new life begins. However short it is until then, it still seems as far as the day is long. It shall pass soon enough, this I understand. And, until that time. She has her life, and I have mine. I shall not intervene in hers and her not in mine.
My question still remains...
Just what makes my matter greater to her than anyone elses? I've nothing greater than my undying love to offer her. Sure, that may seem like enough at first glance or to the hopeless romantic, but in fact I've nothing to give her. So what exactly makes me so unlike all the rest?
~With the thoughts of the only person ever to have been able to penetrate my heart in mind~
 Alucarda Incarnate · Fri Apr 28, 2006 @ 06:09am · 0 Comments |
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